a better version of me

Sur la dernier page du chapitre

2006-10-07T16:41:00.000-04:00

been a warm winter & a cold spring/everywhere i've been's felt wrong to me

2006-09-28T12:44:00.000-04:00

You Should Be In the Indigo Girls

Your all about expressing yourself through music

Lyrics are your poetry - think Sylvia Plath meets guitar

What Girl Group Should You Be In?

you're the real thing.... even better than the real thing, child

2006-09-27T22:52:00.000-04:00

I promised pictures, didn't i?
Bono!

Edge!

U2!

6 degrees

2006-09-25T23:48:00.000-04:00

CELEBRITY SIGHTING: Jay Hernandez.

...making me one degree closer to Hope Davis. *nice*

U2 at the store tomorrow. INSANITY!

Psyched about seeing HARD CANDY tomorrow night... plus GILMORE GIRLS is back!!

Everyone MUST go to itunes and download the song "I'll be your everything" by Dobie featuring Holly Palmer. It's freaking awesome.

-rick
music du jour: Indigo Girls: DESPITE OUR DIFFERENCES
dvd player: THE OFFICE: SEASON TWO
bookbag: ONE HUNDRED YEARS OF SOLITUDE
celebrity sightings: 1
YTD Sightings-19.5

sometime today it will rain

2006-09-15T08:04:00.000-04:00

not much to report lately. work...
one big thing- a final NYC blowout before i head home. i got an amazing seat to see THE VERTICAL HOUR with my favorite actress, Julianne Moore!
so that's good.
pretty much just tired. feeling sick today, hence being up to post at 8:00 in the AM. i feel like fucking crap.... and i'm watching a blah tv thing with Jeremy Sisto- one of the Nightmares & Dreamscapes things. but at least it's got Sisto.

title quote: tanya donelly, "last rain"
music du jour: miles davis: cool & collected
dvd player: lost: season 2
bookbag: 100 Years of Solitude
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-18.5

a gingerbread man and a peanut got married. imagine the baby!

2006-08-24T00:56:00.000-04:00

Today was cool.

I did laundry (not cool)
Watched THE SIMPSONS on dvd (cool)
Got my VERONICA MARS sets in the mail (v. cool)
oh yeah... and then Lily & I went to REVENGE OF THE BOOKEATERS!
It's a benefit for the tutoring program 826NYC that author Dave Eggers is involved in. I love Dave Eggers. Not just because he is the hottest author ever, either. His books are fucking amazing- Both A HEARTBREAKING WORK OF STAGGERING GENIUS and the underrated YOU SHALL KNOW OUR VELOCITY!!! are incredible books. So Lily mentioned this to me a while back. Eggers, Sarah Vowell, John Stewart and Sufjan Stevens were involved. Little did we know, until tonight, that David Byrne of the Talking Heads would be performing as well. It was really cool, very entertaining. I dropped five (of Lily's) dollars into a bucket when Eggers came around collecting donations (I got a thanks. Others got hugs. *sigh*). Sufjan and his band were really great- he's kind of a mad genius. At least that's the vibe I get from him. Sarah Vowell was adorable. John Stewart was funny. DAVID BYRNE PLAYED!!!! I still can't believe it. He did two Heads songs. All in all, a good time.
Of course the other big thing I had planned pre-vacation was hanging with Norana & Jason tomorrow night. However, it seems that my dad is going to be getting here earlier than expected. And since Jason works the closing shift, we wouldn't even be able to start till around 11. We literally have been trying to get together since MAY with no luck but bad luck. Perhaps when I get back things will work out...

Finally, my take on World Music vs. New Age 'music' as discussed with Lily pre-show: I think they take different instruments & forms of world music, suck all the vibrancy and life out of them, and call it New Age.

title quote: Alex.
music du jour: Ani DiFranco- Sufjan Stevens- David Byrne
dvd player: THE SIMPSONS: SEASON 8
bookbag: OUT (oh shit... that's actually in LILY'S bookbag! FUCK!!)

i just wanna put down all the pressures and feel how i really feel

2006-08-23T11:45:00.000-04:00

not much going on lately.
work=customers are stupid assholes.
life= same old blah vs. blah shit. leaning towards NY for the most part at this point. although over the last 24 hours been feeling like home is right. you know, someone actually wrote the words "flip a damn coin already" to me, can you fucking believe that?

the news is that i'm on vacation! and i'm going to road trip through new england with my dad, who i haven't seen in a year. i'm looking forward to seeing some mountains, i tell ya. he ought to be getting here sometime late tomorrow night. at least i hope it's late tomorrow night, as we're having norana & jason over...

erm. that's it.

-rick
really ought to be doing laundry.

title quote: Ani DiFranco, "Half-Assed" from REPRIEVE
music du jour: Ani DiFranco/REPRIEVE
dvd player: KICKING AND SCREAMING (That would be the 1995 Noah Baumbach film, not the Will Ferrell soccer opus)
bookbag: OUT by Natsuo Kirino
celebrity sightings: 0 {well, there was that model from Project Runway, but I don't think I'm going to count her.}
YTD Sightings-17.5 {okay, maybe I'll count her a little.}

This isn't good cop/bad cop. This is fag & New Yorker.

2006-08-19T02:18:00.000-04:00

...or "Don't Quit Your Gay Job"

watched two movies tonight. PRIME. Eh. I liked the lead guy, felt Uma Thurman was miscast a bit- they had no chemistry whatsoever. Loved Meryl Streep. I really wanted to like this movie and totally expected to, as I loved Ben Younger's other film, BOILER ROOM. However, I didn't like it. Disappointing.

felt much better when, even though I wasn't really in the mood for it, we watched KISS KISS, BANG BANG. Fucking LOVED that movie. It's entertaining, witty, a mystery you wanna solve- just really great entertainment. AND, the writer/director is Shane Black, who wrote one of my favorite action films, THE LONG KISS GOODNIGHT. (ok he also wrote some LETHAL WEAPON movies. whatever.) Plus, Val Kilmer of all people plays someone who is probably my favorite gay character in film since his co-star Robert Downey, jr. in HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS. for so long I have wanted to see a gay man who's a fucking bad-ass, smart aleck, take no shit character. Who says "fuck" as much as me. Gay Perry is definitely that. This is a movie I have to own on dvd at some point so that every time I want to kill myself over NOAH'S ARC or WILL & GRACE, I can watch something with a character who is actually really fucking cool. Netflix it NOW!!

-rick
title quote: KISS KISS, BANG BANG
music du jour: Ani DiFranco, REPRIEVE
dvd player: BRICK
bookbag: OUT by Natsuo Kirino
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

listen, this stands to reason; sure as the seasons, you know you & i can't be wrong; when you walk into the room, it's like a song...

2006-08-17T00:21:00.000-04:00

Body:
Step right up for the new issue of Pictures & Frames!!

Covered this month: Jay McInerny's book, THE GOOD LIFE; A trio of musicians, Sufjan Stevens, Johnny Cash & Matt Kearney; Plus, a plethora of new movies reviewed to make up for last month's lack of flicks: WORLD TRADE CENTER; LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE; LADY IN THE WATER; SUPERMAN RETURNS; SCOOP; CLERKS 2; The Bronx Tale on DVD and, back by popular demand, the Itinerant Saturday Night Brooklyn Gang take a deeper look than they'd like at Sharon Stone in BASIC INSTINCT 2.

All this plus new staff pics & bios, Canadian hottie Ryan Gosling in the movie of the month and a Spotlight column on filmmaker Ed Burns, is yours for the taking at: Pictures & Frames!

xxoo,
Rick
(who contributed the SCOOP review & will be quizzing randomly to ensure that you've read it)

title quote: Bic Runga, "Listen" from BIRDS
music du jour: *Songs I Know By Heart* mix: Bic Runga/Travis/Holly Palmer
dvd player: THE WEST WING: Season One
bookbag: HOUDINI!!! by Kenneth Silverman
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

counting on a miracle

2006-08-15T02:09:00.000-04:00

So today at work, Foxy Hillary asked me why I was single, when she totally wants to marry me. I was just like, "eh... i don't think i want anything at this point." which is somewhat true, considering that I don't know if I'll still be in this city come December. Later on I was thinking about it some more and realized: The fact is? I don't like most other gay men very much.

Incidentally, I'm so homophobic that I even hate myself.

I'm tired. And honestly, I didn't do much at work today... So my second realization was that this constant exhaustion is probably also due to stress. The Miami vs. NYC stress. Family vs. My Life. Because I think about it a lot. And honestly, unless I'm distracted with a movie or a book or my flatmates armed with Nerf guns, it's weighing on my mind. That includes being at work. When I'm busy with someone, or doing something that requires focus, I'm fine. But as soon as there's nothing going on or I'm doing something mindless, like scanning books, it's all I think about. It seems like I'd feel better once I came to a definitive decision, but it's just not forthcoming. I miss my family and I know they miss me. The thought of them feeling sad makes me depressed. But they are bound to Florida and it is not likely that this will ever change, that they will ever pick up and move closer to me. On the other hand, I have a life here. All of my friends from Miami are here now. I've made new friends here- honestly, I like people up here more. Back in Florida, there's really no potential for anything to happen for me. I will just go back to being the loser who depends on his parents for rides to work... Who does nothing, ever, and will probably end up never doing anything. But what it comes down to is that either choice I make, I have to give up something important.

oh right... you've read all this before.

it's like there's someone with a fever yelling at my pants!!

2006-08-14T01:09:00.000-04:00

I haven't blogged in a bit.
Last week, I wrote down our itinerary on a balloon.
WED: Little Miss Sunshine; Project Runway
THURS: Have no fun without me!
FRI: GLOOM with Jason & Norana; Tacos!
SAT: WEEDS; Korner Pizza; Haute Tension
SUN: HOLLY PALMER!!

WED: By the time Wednesday actually came around, we had already decided to maybe see MONSTER HOUSE instead of LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE as MH was playing at our favorite local theatre. However, I was really tired after work so we ended up not going to see anything. We did watch PROJECT RUNWAY, though. Why is Angela still on it?!?

THURS: I worked. I didn't make lunch as I planned on treating myself to dinner during my break. Of course... it rained. I ate garlic bagel chips in the break room. After work, went to the diner (where, as I was leaving, I realized two of the people I work with were sitting a couple of tables away from me. I wasn't very observant, as I was reading...) Turns out that if I had been able to go to the diner during my break, I would have run into X+J who had met there for dinner. They swore that they had no fun without me. Who knows if they're telling the truth.

FRIDAY: Norana cancelled GLOOM night. Which, btw- probably will never happen what with everyone's schedules & all. We are doomed! However, we still had tacos and got caught up on PSYCH. Then, Lily came home and we all watched the pilot for STUDIO 60 ON THE SUNSET STRIP- the forthcoming Aaron Sorkin show... it's freaking awesome. X+I watched the KIDNAPPED pilot (our station's in it! the Jeremy Sisto connections keep coming!!), which I didn't expect to like, but totally loved.

SATURDAY: Another weekend, another weekend we didn't see WEEDS. We did watch the second disc of the first season of VENTURE BROS. Which rocks. Then H. came over and we all had pizza. Then HIGH TENSION- okay if you don't want to know how it ends, skip to Sunday. Because here's what. I always sensed that HIGH TENSION would be similar to WOLF CREEK. Characters go somewhere. Characters are shockingly attacked by bad people. Bad people do really fucked up, torturous things to characters. Rick is uncomfortable and nauseous. There's nothing scary, it's just really gory. And... I was right. BUT it was kinda entertaining- until the twist ending. Here's the spoiler: The twist is that the French girl we see as the hero is actually the psycho killer. Yep. It ends like five hundred thousand other movies. The thing with those movies, however is that they tie it up sweetly and you think- "oh my god, I can't believe it was them all along!" ...or you've already guessed and can't wait for this trend to be over. HIGH TENSION does not fucking DO that. And that's why I really, really disliked it. Anyway, afterwards, everyone was going to watch EULOGY. Which I gave 30 minutes, because I love Zooey Deschanel & Famke Janssen. It was just really dull and unfunny, though, so I stopped watching & did the dishes instead.

SUNDAY: Went to see MONSTER HOUSE with X+J. Another good movie. I'm glad... this summer has been full of overlong, uninspired movies. This one was just the candy I wanted it to be. Then... HOLLY PALMER. She played Arlene's Grocery- J. went with me to see her tonight. I saw her in May & it was the best show I've seen all year. I'm a big fan of Holly's, and before that show I'd only gotten to see her once- in 1997. And at the time, I had no idea who she was. Suffice it to say, I was happy to get the chance to see her play again. She did a great set (favorite moment: "La vie en rose"- accapella) even though it seemed a bit short. Afterwards, J. & I hung out so that I could get a tee- Holly was really sweet & actually seemed to remember me from the last show, and said "you change your name a lot" on Myspace. I wished her luck on the rest of the tour (she's still touring with Gnarls Barkley- but there are some solo shows, too- check out her Myspace page from mine!) and left. Oh yeah, she suggested I go with a green tee & I'm glad I did. Tonight made me very happy.

On my own, I had planned to watch 5 dvds over the weekend. Since my birthday in December, there has been a stack of dvds next to my television. The stack kept growing and I never had the time to watch everything. On Friday, I was finally down to 5 movies. I had three days off.
I have watched two. (WUTHERING HEIGHTS and THE PRIZE WINNER OF DEFIANCE, OHIO) I don't know how much blame can go to pOKeCupid guy and AIM, but certainly some of it. I'm about to watch number 3, Wim Wenders' DON'T COME KNOCKING. Hopefully, at some point this week, I'll be able to watch the last two- V FOR VENDETTA and INSIDE MAN. I really would like to watch THE WEST WING from start to finish, and Lily has 'em on dvd... We'll see if it happens. Hmmph. Work. If anyone knows how I can get paid to sit in front of the air conditioner, drinking Kool Aid & watching dvds, please let me know. Thanks.

There should be a new issue of Pictures & Frames up soon- I will definitely post here & on Myspace to let everyone know.

-rick
title quote: VENTURE BROS. (can you say addicted?)
music du jour: Holly Palmer: SONGS FOR TUESDAY
dvd player: DON'T COME KNOCKING
bookbag: HOUDINI!!!
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17
Days till vacation: 10

All right, you little freshman bitches- AIR RAID!! ...That was PATHETIC!!

2006-08-09T01:16:00.000-04:00

Is anything better than Parker Posey tormenting freshmen in DAZED & CONFUSED? I think not...

Laundry Day Mix:
Cat Power: I Found a Reason
Jane Siberry: Love is Everything
Sarah Polley: Courage
The Beautiful South: I'll Sail This Ship Alone
Ben Lee: In My Life
Ben Taylor: Safe Enough to Wake Up
Bif Naked: Lucky
Björk: New World
Blur: Beetlebum (Moby's Mix)
Brandi Carlile: What Can I Say?
The Caesars: It's Not the Fall That Hurts
The Carpenters: Goodbye to Love
Cat Stevens: The Wind
Chantal Kreviazuk: What if It All Means Something
Chet Baker: My Funny Valentine
Chris Isaak: Wicked Game
Chris Whitley: Big Sky Country
Citizen Cope: Sideways
Claudine Longet: God Only Knows
Cranberries: Linger
Dandy Warhols: We Used to Be Friends
Death Cab for Cutie: Transatlanticism
Delfonics: Didn't I Blow Your Mind This Time
Devlins: The World Outside
Dixie Chicks: Not Ready to Make Nice
Duncan Sheik: Barely Breathing

I also realized that amazingly, I didn't have Edie Brickell & New Bohemian's SHOOTING RUBBERBANDS AT THE STARS album on my ipod, or anything from her solo disc, PICTURE PERFECT MORNING, so added them to the ipod and listened for a while. X gave me 3 different mixes he made with some really cool stuff on them, too.

Cooked for everyone, watched Veronica Mars *and* Life on Mars. AND Psych, with the hot guy with the nose (aka James Roday) and am currently enjoying a cold gingerale in my room while watching the Criterion Edition of DAZED & CONFUSED.

Oh, also finished reading V FOR VENDETTA. I still like the movie better, but it was pretty good. I usually enjoy the basic story behind Alan Moore's stuff (WATCHMEN; FROM HELL; V...) but have to force myself to get through the actual reading. I still like WATCHMEN best. Tomorrow I'll get back to the Houdini biography, after which I'm going to re-read Philip Pullman's HIS DARK MATERIALS trilogy. Oh... and I really wanna read Natsuo Kirino's novel OUT, but I've got that one at work for um... moments of peace. I still can't believe I managed to read so much Harry Potter at work. Lately it seems like I'm always... er, working.

-rick

Stranger Danger!!

2006-08-05T12:59:00.000-04:00

music du jour: I've had a Sinéad O'Connor song stuck in my head since I woke up
dvd player: THE MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW: SEASON FOUR
bookbag: HOUDINI!!! by Kenneth Silverman
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

but you must always know how long to stay, and when to go away...

2006-08-04T00:41:00.000-04:00

Jessica Simpson is covering a Patty Griffin song. "Let Him Fly" was previously covered by the Dixie Chicks on their "Fly" album, and it was good. Because... they're the Dixie Chicks. Jessica Simpson is not good. Jessica Simpson covering Patty Griffin is really, really not good.

:::try to think of it this way, rick... Jessica sells albums. millions. mysteriously. for each one sold, Patty gets royalties off of the song. then gets to continue making *her* music and bringing you joy:::

i still want to vomit everything i've ever eaten. this is so much worse than when she covered the Robbie Williams song, "Angels"

title quote: "Let Him Fly" by Patty Griffin from LIVING WITH GHOSTS
music du jour: I started the day with Sinéad O'Connor, then switched over to Björk for the rest.
dvd player: I'm on the last episode of CHARLIE'S ANGELS: SEASON THREE and tomorrow I think I may watch THE GODFATHER pts. I & II
bookbag: HOUDINI!!! by Kenneth Silverman.
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

what if it's all dust? that's it, just star stuff- and the light that i see burned away long before me...

2006-08-02T01:41:00.000-04:00

I had to write up a bio for Pictures & Frames today. It's fun to write about oneself in the third person.

Rick Sayre was born the same year those two cinematic masterpieces, THE WAY WE WERE and THE EXORCIST were released. You may correctly assume that he is a homosexual with a penchant for horror films. He has always loved music (First album: The Go-Go's/VACATION; Favorite musician: Bic Runga) and books (Favorites: The Time Traveler's Wife; The Secret History; Good Omens). He credits the early 90s for instilling a love of film in him after the 1-2-3 punch of FRIED GREEN TOMATOES, MY OWN PRIVATE IDAHO and the Keanu Reeves' classic, POINT BREAK, left him in awe of the visceral power of The Cinema. His tastes have changed (somewhat) since then & he includes among his favorite films MY MAN GODFREY; BRINGING UP BABY; ROPE; REAR WINDOW; CHARADE; WHAT'S UP, DOC?; EMPIRE OF THE SUN; EVE'S BAYOU; ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND and of course, CLUE. His cinematic heroes include a few of the usual suspects (Hitchcock; Kurosawa; Tarantino; Woody Allen; David Fincher), but he also loves the ladies (Kasi Lemmons; Lisa Cholodenko; Rebecca Miller; Allison Anders). He has a special place in his heart for the films of Carole Lombard, Julianne Moore and Christian Bale. He has a VERY special place in his heart for the films of Keanu Reeves. He has a special place in his garbage disposal for the films of Brett Ratner, Michael Bay & Jennifer Lopez. Rick spends his days selling books to the masses (Favorite titles: The Complete Idiot's Guide to Being a Model and Snakes on a Plane: The Novelization), but secretly believes himself to be a writer. He has been an accessory to crimes committed by Mr. The Fink Productions, acting in the short films "Mystery Showcase" and "The Poker Game" (which is available on video through the Fink website). Rick is a proud member of the Itinerant Saturday Night Brooklyn Gang and, as such, has been traumatized by the likes of CATWOMAN; NATIONAL TREASURE; HIDE & SEEK; and BASIC INSTINCT 2. And he still liked them all much, much more than CRASH.

With 1/2 of the flatmates out of town, I came home, got a pizza and have been watching CHARLIE'S ANGELS in front of the a/c and messing with my Myspace profile. I spent most of the week thinking that I had tomorrow off, only to discover that it was an oversight and that in fact, I won't be spending the day... um... eating leftover pizza and watching more CHARLIE'S ANGELS in front of the a/c. Blimey.
-rick

title quote: Paul Bryan, "Star Stuff" from HANDCUFF KING
music du jour: Paul Bryan: HANDCUFF KING; Holly Palmer: SONGS FOR TUESDAY
dvd player: CHARLIE'S ANGELS: SEASON THREE
bookbag: HOUDINI!!! by Kenneth Silverman (although I may hold off so that I can re-read the Philip Pullman HIS DARK MATERIALS novels)
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

Friendship is certainly the finest balm for the pangs of disappointed love.

2006-07-31T02:16:00.000-04:00

Finally got around to reading my last Jane Austen novel, NORTHANGER ABBEY. I had forgotten what a pleasure it is to read my dear Jane.
On the opposite side of the spectrum, I've been watching the third season of CHARLIE'S ANGELS on dvd. Crazy fun. It's a guilty pleasure that completely reminds me of my childhood. Between Austen & Cheryl Ladd and last weeks all Hitchcock/all the time dvdfest I find myself more and more convinced that I ought to have been born in another time. *sigh*

-rick
title quote: Jane Austen, NORTHANGER ABBEY
music du jour: Paul Bryan* Badly Drawn Boy* Keane
dvd player: CHARLIE'S ANGELS: SEASON THREE
bookbag: NORTHANGER ABBEY by Jane Austen
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

If you put our heads together, it would make a hollow sound.

2006-07-28T18:59:00.000-04:00

Yet another crappy week, so depressed, hating life.

Today I woke up & took myself uptown (well, uptown for me...) to see SCOOP at the 11 AM show. Fucking fantastic, it cheered me up greatly. I don't remember the last time I went to a movie and laughed for almost 90 minutes straight. I wrote a review, but it's for Pictures & Frames, so you'll have to wait until it's up there next week to read it.

*sigh* Thanks, Woody. I needed that...

is it any wonder that i'm tired?

2006-07-26T00:32:00.000-04:00

or Postcards from Brooklyn. Yeah, this is how we roll in Kensington:

Our weapons of choice.

Monkeys do it on our fridge!

We miss each other when we're gone.

title quote: Keane, "Is it any wonder?" from UNDER THE IRON SEA
music du jour: Kylie (oh who's a stereotypical fag NOW?) and Dave's mixes
dvd player: TORN CURTAIN
bookbag: JOIN ME
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

courage couldn't come at a worse time.

2006-07-25T01:38:00.000-04:00

or A Very Sarah Polley Day.

I've been feeling very Sarah Polley lately. I have the recurring desire to watch DAWN OF THE DEAD again. I keep thinking I want to watch THE SWEET HEREAFTER. They're fleeting thoughts, though.

Today, walking down 18th street to work, Sarah's version of "Courage" by the Tragically Hip (from THE SWEET HEREAFTER soundtrack) played on my ipod. I listened to it three times, it really hit me... this is happening lately, songs that meant one thing before mean something different now- like "Watershed" by the Indigo Girls- my new theme song. So I start thinking a few things:
A: Must watch SWEET HEREAFTER again.
B: I Love Sarah Polley.
C: Hey, I never got that Tragically Hip song.
D: I like the other song she does, "One More Colour" by Jane Siberry.
E: Hey, I never got that Jane Siberry collection.

I go to work, blah blah blah. I look up the best of comps for Tragically Hip & Jane Siberry. I'm more interested in Siberry, because I've loved a few songs by her. The Tragically Hip are one of those bands I'm vaguely aware of, but curious about. Their 2 disc best of is like 18 bucks. Jane's? 32 bucks. I vow to visit itunes.

I go to my break. Now, originally I planned on having a sandwich tonight and going for pizza tomorrow afternoon. However, my manager gave me tomorrow off, so I go for pizza today (I needed to break a 20 so I can do laundry). Post-pizza, I was drawn, as I often am, to ACADEMY RECORDS. They have lots of awesome dvds at really good prices. I'm browsing and what do I see? DON'T COME KNOCKING! It's not even out yet, officially. AND it's only 18 bucks. And yes... it has Sarah Polley.

Hit itunes and got "Courage" and Jane Siberry's "Love is Everything" -"One More Colour" is not available there motherfuckers. Let's hear it for Canada, eh?

title quote: "Courage" -The Tragically Hip, from YER FAVORITES
music du jour: I heard a lot of Olivia Newton-John today.
dvd player: PSYCHO from ALFRED HITCHCOCK: THE MASTERPIECE COLLECTION
bookbag: JOIN ME by Danny Wallace
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

Thought: Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food; frequently there must be a beverage.

2006-07-24T12:23:00.000-04:00

Haven't posted in a while. Tired and depressed.

*Saw PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN 2. Thought it was fun, in general. Kinda long. Always painful to watch Orlando Bloom try to act, but felt that Keira Knightley is back in her terrain and felt positive about her again. Will never understand the Oscar nomination for PRIDE & PREJUDICE '05. Loved the villains with barnacle growing on them.

*Wondering what it is with me and new films. The last three films I've seen in theatres- X-MEN 3; SUPERMAN RETURNS; PIRATES... have been disappointing. Is it just that... they're summer movies & supposed to be brain candy & I'm always hoping for something more? X-MEN & PIRATES are sequels to movies I love that let me down. Have my tastes changed? I really feel like if I saw them again, I'd enjoy them more. PIRATES was actually good, just so very long. And as far as stuff coming out, the only thing I'm dying to see- and will take myself to see on Friday when it opens- is SCOOP.

*Is it my fault that LITTLE MAN did better at the box office than CLERKS 2? If so, point your fingers at my flatmates as well, Kevin Smith. I'm usually so psyched about Smith's movies. (except for JERSEY GIRL obviously, what with the whole JLO thing) I actually found myself unsubbing from his MySpace blog because I got so sick of him shilling the movie 24/7. Did that make me less enthusiastic? Because i remember a time when I saw the trailer and peed my pants, I was so excited. Hmmmph.

*Speaking of peeing, when you hit 32? Your bladder shrinks to the size of a pea. I don't know if I'm drinking more than normal, but fuck- I think I had to get up to use the bathroom 4 times last night. This is the recurring theme of my week.

*It's official, I'm the most homophobic person I know. I've started referring to myself as an ex-gay. I feel totally apart from the gay community and have found that in fact, I don't like 90% of the gay men that I encounter, either in person or in the depths of reality television. Actually, I kind of want to hit 90% of the gay men that I encounter in person or in the depths of reality television. I suppose I thought that in New York City there would be the opportunity to meet gay men who were not cookie cutter Queer as Folk coiffed moisturized gym toned clones. Sadly, this is not the case. I feel like every stereotype you see is actually true for the majority of gay men. It's depressing. I've met so many unique people in this city, but it seems that if you're queer you still have to fit into some little box. "They're all made out of ticky tacky & they all look just the same..."

*On a related note, pt. 1: Fuck Madonna. Seriously, I have all of her albums. She's good, she's been cutting edge, a visionary- in pop music. But she's getting desperate. The whole being crucified on a Vegas cross thing smells of a pathetic desire for attention. Last night, I was reading about the upcoming film adaptation of Andrew Lloyd Webber's SUNSET BOULEVARD and how it will star Glenn Close. Of course there were people who thought Madonna should play the role. When someone pointed out that her acting skills are far less than, every queen online had a hissy fit. It's the blind adoration that bothers me.

*MYSPACE I FUCKING HATE YOU!! You make some things so great- the constant keeping in touch with friends and musicians. In fact, the fact that it's the best source for info on my favorite singers is probably the one thing keeping me from quitting Myspace- again. I'm tempted to unfriend so many people that are frighteningly addicted to it, posting bulletins every fucking day, clearly begging for comments, picture comments, blog comments, oh my GOD! I used to think I was one of those unfortunate addicts, but no... Two days without MySpace and some people are close to suicide. It's fucking scary. Should I just post a bulletin saying "I'm sorry, I'm only going to use MySpace for music stuff from now on- don't take it personal and go crazy, but I'm unfriending everyone?"

must go eat now.
-rick
title quote: Woody Allen from the book "Side Effects"
music du jour: it feels like a Patty Griffin kind of day.
dvd player: PSYCHO, part of my Hitchcock Masterpiece Collection viewing.
bookbag: JOIN ME by Daniel Wallace
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

i'm like the rain without the spain, i'm like the mark without the twain

2006-07-15T23:40:00.000-04:00

and of course here i am 9 hours later and i keep thinking i wish i could stay and why don't i go to FL for the holidays but stay the rest of the year after all. and then immediately i think, no can't do that. fuck. and then i think, you know it's easier to move back home, but if i go home it's pretty much impossible to get back here. fuck

this is what it's like, pretty much, every day.

say after me: i'll go my own way baby

2006-07-15T12:40:00.000-04:00

Surprise party for J's birthday went well. X made pizzas, we played some games, watched a little Poltergeist & a little Jaws- and a little White Noise. Clearly we have developed a case of mass A.D.D. Good Coldstone cake with peanut butter cups. Of course part of my gift to her still hasn't arrived (nor has WEEDS dammit) but that's okay, I drew a picture for her.

X's friend who was supposed to move in after I left will be here again this weekend. I feel like the right thing to do is to find out when she needs to be here and plan my move accordingly. A few extra months seriously doesn't matter that much. And I am leaving. And it would be nice if she could room with people she knew- in a safe neighborhood- for a really cheap price. But whenever I bring up leaving, people either don't want to hear about it or try to talk me out of it. I have to be with my family. I have to have more financial breathing room to pay off my debts, not just the bare minimum every month. Seriously, I ought to have left when I originally said I was going to, this extension is just making it more difficult on me and everyone else...

I am a fucking idiot.

how scandinavian of me

2006-07-13T02:30:00.000-04:00

so the latest issue of Pictures & Frames is now up at www.picturesandframesmagazine.com.

This month in...
MOVIES: So we got lazy & threw down one sentence reviews for everything from SUPERMAN RETURNS to A SCANNER DARKLY (whoa!) to THE KING.

DVDS: BILOXI BLUES gets it's due. Back by popular demand, the itinerant Saturday Night Brooklyn gang talks their way through the Robert De Niro/Dakota Fanning romantic comedy, HIDE AND SEEK. If you make it through that epic, you can read about Lisa Cholodenko's adaptation of Dorothy Allison's great novel, CAVEDWELLER.

BOOKS: Only one of us can read, and the result is a love letter to Jane Fonda & her autobiography, MY LIFE SO FAR.

MUSIC: Teddy Geiger, Paul Bryan, ELIZABETHTOWN and The BOSS all get some love. Not to ruin the surprise, but this months music reviews are all ipod-lickin' good.

SPOTLIGHT: Resident Spotlighter shines his beam on director John Sayles

all this plus a lovely Mary-Louise Parker photo and Jimmy Stewart in the Film of the Month can be yours... FOR FREE because that's the way we roll at Pictures & Frames.

until we go legit and can charge. ...then will I get paid?
Thanks for listening

title quote: Björk
music du jour: Paul Bryan- Beth Thornley
dvd player: MORLANG
bookbag: Franny & Zooey by JD Salinger
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

am i wrong? have i run too far to get home? have i gone & left you there alone? if i would could you?

2006-07-08T11:30:00.000-04:00

i woke up earlyish today and thought, "awesome! i can sleep some more!" but then i couldn't get back to sleep because i couldn't remember the name of the other guy in Alice in Chains- not Layne Staley, I remembered there was a C to his name. i had to look him up online. I'm going to get out of bed now.
...Jerry Cantrell. duh.

title quote: Alice in Chains, "Would?" from DIRT
music du jour: Paul Bryan, HANDCUFF KING
dvd player: The Work of Director Mark Romanek
bookbag: Middlesex, by Jeffrey Eugenides
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

good things come to those who...

2006-07-07T13:47:00.000-04:00

waiting in line at Foodtown, i of course pick the checkout aisle with an older lady buying three times as much as me, who then has to have it delivered home. it takes a while, in fact i stand in line longer than it took me to do my shopping. but at one point she waves her hand at me (i'm listening to Aimee on my ipod) and asks if i want a piece of candy. it was a butterscotch, the kind my Grandpa used to give to waitresses & anybody he talked to while we were out. i smiled and thanked her. she said she was sorry for making me wait & i told her i was in no rush. the candy was good.

down so low

2006-07-05T22:19:00.000-04:00

so i've been down over the last two days and it hit me a little while ago why that might be. originally July 5th was supposed to be my last day at work, and I would be heading back to my family on the 7th. the constant battle between missing them and enjoying my life here... wondering if my decision was a mistake, even wondering (again) how i could have ever thought i'd be able to live so far away from them in the first place. wish i could just pick up and leave one day when no one expects it. i can't take anybody else asking me to stay, even if they aren't purposely doing it, they just make me feel bad. i'm ditching people either way. fuck. this is all the same shit i've posted a hundred times before. proof that it's not getting any easier. i just want my family. ideally i want my family up here with me, but that is really never going to happen. i hate miami, but i choose them, where ever they are.

miserably yours,
xxoo

starfuckers, inc.

2006-07-04T15:39:00.000-04:00

Quick! Which celebrities have you met/seen/stalked (in person, only!)

MET:
1. Christian Bale. This was in 1996 when pretty much geeks who loved NEWSIES and/or Little Women obsessed folk were the only people who were big fans. Oh yeah, I was an original Balehead. He was presenting an award at EPCOT center for Discover magazine. I met up in Orlando with my friend Lisa just to go see. He was then & still is my number one favorite movie person. And he shook my hand. And I fell in love. And should the house ever start to burn down, the first thing I'll save is my picture of us. (And THEN J, as promised) *sigh* (oh yeah, also the chick who played his love interest in PORTRAIT OF A LADY was with him...)

I usually try to keep cool, but I've have openly gushed over two people.
2. Parker Posey. I spoke with her on the phone at my job when I first arrived in the city. I actually said "I LOVE you!" She said, "I love you, too!" She was a hoot!
3. Miriam Shor, who played Yitzhak in "Hedwig & the Angry Inch"- At my work. She was lovely & I think a bit surprised that I recognized her- which I only did after seeing her name as she was sans beard & RENT t-shirt. She was buying THE OFFICE on dvd as well as one of the seasons of WONDER WOMAN. At the time I didn't know, but she had been doing a play at the theatre on Union Square. When I saw her name, I said "Hedwig!" She said, "Yes!" I said, "Wonderful!" Yeah, no one cares, but if you love HEDWIG you'll understand.

Semi-Gush:
4. Daniel V from "Project Runway" (ok, he stopped me to ask where the design books were and I *did* wish him good luck & told him that I was rooting for him. Only to realize later that Fashion Week was over and by then he'd already lost. my bad!)

I've interacted with a few celebs at work, without commenting:
5. Jessica Lange (I helped her find a book, my first celebrity interaction that *wasn't* over the telephone. She was wearing dark glasses, but was just as beautiful as you would imagine.)
6. Sam Shepard (I've seen him in the store at least three times since I started. Although never with Jessica. Once I got to help him, when he asked me where the Poetry section was. My mom was so very jealous.)
7. Ric Ocasek of The Cars. He's in the store a LOT. I rang him up once in music (many Sesame Street dvds. He's got the membership card, too.) but didn't say anything despite being in awe that the guy who wrote some of my favorite songs EVER was standing right in front of me.
8. Eddie Izzard. He was in the music department one day. There were two of us on register but I didn't get him. Dammit. He bought a giant stack of stuff and signed up for the card. I really wanted to tell him how much I loved THE CAT'S MEOW but didn't.
9. Peter Dinklage, of THE STATION AGENT. I had seen him once when J. & I went to see "Sweeney Todd" for my birthday. Then he was in the store, when I worked in music (1st floor is SO much better for sightings). I helped him find a cd folder.

Most of my sightings were stage door rendezvous.
10. Jonathan Pryce, "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels"
11. Gregory Jbara, "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels" (He's a character actor from IN & OUT and A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM)
12. Lee Pace, "Guardians" (He's only the hottest guy on the planet. One of them. He was in SOLDIER'S GIRL and one of my favorite shows, WONDERFALLS. He didn't ask me to marry him and I was too bowled over to say anything because he's probably the best looking person I've ever encountered. Um, I should also mention that he's an extraordinary actor who gave a flawless performance.)
13. Ralph Fiennes, "Faith Healer" (He took the time to sign everyone's playbill, looked you in the eye. Amazing.)
14. Cherry Jones, "Faith Healer" She's maybe someone only theatre people will recognize. She was in "Signs" but I'll always remember her from another amazing & underrated film, "The Cradle Will Rock." She's also an out lesbian, a Tony winner and a Southerner. I wanted to hug her.
15. Ian McDiarmid, "Faith Healer" I guess he is known for being in the new Star Wars films as the Emperor. I've only seen two of them, so I don't really remember him much. He did manage to steal the show from both Ralph Fiennes & Cherry Jones, which is kind of a big deal.

Brief sightings/Run-ins:
16. Chris "Mr. Big" Noth
17. Taye Diggs...
18. & Chad Lowe (on the same night)
19. Robert Sean Leonard (a fleeting glimpse)
20. Patrick Wilson (Once on the L train, once in the store.)
21. Katherine Moening (of The L WORD)
22. Julia Stiles (standing outside of the theatre to see "History Boys")

unlock this handcuff king

2006-07-04T11:59:00.000-04:00

hooray for Independence and all, but... damn no mail. i want my Paul Bryan cd.

Eleanor, I think you've had one too many G & T's.

2006-07-03T12:38:00.000-04:00

So, watching MATCH POINT after really devouring all these other Woody Allen movies is kind of odd. In a way it's as though his voice is nowhere to be found here. It's still a really good movie. Although, Jonathan Rhys Meyers? I'm finally going to admit it: I *REALLY* don't like him. He was awesome in VELVET GOLDMINE, but I don't think I've ever seen him in anything else and liked him/not been kind of creeped out by him. He's pretty, I guess, if that's the sort you go for. Not me. Not on the Rhys Meyers train.
I'm very curious about SCOOP, wondering what it'll be like. Scarlett Johansson is a really good actress, I think & a very good fit with Woody Allen, so I'm looking forward to it a lot. In fact, I will probably take myself to see it the day it opens, first showing. It makes me really happy that I've discovered Woody Allen's films. yaay :)

this is my storyline/my piece of the sky

2006-07-02T10:17:00.000-04:00

How Much Have You Changed?

5 YEARS AG0.....

How old were you?: 27

Where did you go to school?: By then I'd become the underachiever you see before you.

Where did you work? Barnes & Noble, West Kendall

Where did you live? Miami- at home with my family.

Where did you hang out? Er. At home with my family.

How was your hair style: probably still scruffy, possibly dyed red.

Did you wear braces?: nope, not anymore by then.

Did you wear glasses? yes

Who was your best friend? Not sure. I think this would've been post-Alina. Maybe Lily by then.

Who was your regular-person crush?: Oh god, whatever cute guy worked at B&N at that point.

How many tattoos did you have?: None

How many piercings did you have?: None

What car did you drive? I took the bus.

What was your favorite band/group: Indigo Girls, Ben Folds

What was your worst fear?: Not knowing what I was going to do with my life.

Had you smoked a cigarette yet?: Nope.

Had you gotten drunk or high yet?: Yesh. And I think as a result, pretty much stopped drinking. mostly.

Had you driven yet?: Yes. And fucking HATED it.

Had you been to a real party yet?: A real party. Yes, because I'm sure that by 2001 I had already come to the realization that I hate parties.

Had your heart broken?: 2 years earlier, had recovered by then.

3 YEARS AGO...

How old were you?: 29

Where did you go to school?: Still no.

Where did you work? Barnes and Noble, West Kendall

Where did you live? Miami, with my family.

Where did you hang out? Still at home with my family.

How was your hair style: Probably the same.

Did you wear braces?: No

Did you wear glasses? Yes

Who was your best friend? Lily, Matty

Who was your regular-person crush?: uh. Armstrong probably.

How many tattoos did you have? None

How many piercings did you have?: None

What car did you drive? Still rode the bus.

What was your favorite band/group: Indigo Girls; Bic Runga; Patty Griffin

What was your worst fear?: Not knowing what I was going to do with my life.

Had you smoked a cigarette yet?: Nope.

Had you gotten drunk or high yet?: Yes

Had you driven yet?: Yeah, I didn't go back in time and undrive.

Had you been to a real party yet?: yeah

Had your heart broken?: Not since the last time, I had mini-crushes, nothing serious.

**HA HA HA!!! LETS SEE WHAT YOU ARE NOW !!!!!**
___________________________________________________ (that sounded really devious)

June 2006

How old are you?: 32

Where do you go to school?: Your mom's.

Where do you work? Barnes and Noble, Union Square

Where do you live? Brooklyn, with X+J & Lily

Where do you hang out? Brooklyn, with X+J & sometimes Lily.

How is your hair style: Short. Not dyed.

Do you wear braces?: No.

Do you wear glasses?: Still, yes. Although apparently only 10% of the people I work with realize that I do. It's nice to be noticed.

Who is your best friend? Lily, X, J & Norana. Like Ruffles, you can't have just one. Or... is that Pringles?

Who is your regular-person crush? yeah, I don't do that anymore. There were two guys at work that got me all tongue-tied & crushy feeling, but they've left, so... I'm safe.

How many tattoos do you have now?: None, although Norana says I should get one.

How many piercings do you have now?: Still none.

What car do you drive?: None. I take the train & walk, dammit!!

What is your favorite band/group: Bic Runga; Holly Palmer

What is your worst fear now? Being without my family, or being without my friends. It will be realized soon enough.

Had you smoked a cigarette yet?: no.

Had you gotten drunk or high yet?: no.

Do you drive?: No, thank god

Have you been to a real party yet?: I still avoid parties.

Have you had your heart broken yet?: yeah, but it lead me here. which, let's face it, might not be a good thing. and at least the first time was on a worthwhile human.

title quote: Tanya Donelly
music du jour: i can't stop listening to Holly Palmer/SONGS FOR TUESDAY. it's scaring me.
dvd player: MELINDA & MELINDA
bookbag: Middlesex
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

no matter how i tried, i realized that i could not conjure you

2006-07-01T17:20:00.000-04:00

The previously mentioned Crushworthy Paul Bryan.

it's true. the last time i was inside a woman was when i visited the statue of liberty.

2006-07-01T17:14:00.000-04:00

This was more than a little creepy. I totally thought I'd get Sofia Coppola....

Woody Allen

Your film will be 57% romantic, 47% comedy, 32% complex plot, and a $ 29 million budget.

Be prepared to have your life story shot entirely in New York City -- though lately Woody's been loving shooting in London. Also, your music soundtrack is all jazz from before 1949. Filmography: Annie Hall, Manhattan, Stardust Memories, Everyone Says I Love You, Match Point, etc. Woody has released one film per year consistently for the past 35 years. For the past 15 years he's been trying to make films like his older, funnier ones, just like characters in his Stardust Memories film suggest throughout. Regardless of his personal life, his films are American classics.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender
:

You scored higher than 67%
on action-romance

You scored higher than 90%
on humor

You scored higher than 12%
on complexity

You scored higher than 20%
on budget

Link: The Director Who Films Your Life Test written by bingomosquito on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

what you want, you don't know. you're with stupid now. so on with the show.

2006-07-01T13:49:00.000-04:00

So for those of you who didn't know, I took a day trip to Boston this week. My friend Shawn invited me up to see Aimee Mann play with the Boston Pops. I was pretty excited, having never been to Boston- but also having never seen Aimee play despite the fact that I've been a gigantic fan of hers for- 16 years, now. She's really one of my top 5 favorites (Hmmm- Bic Runga; Indigo Girls; Aimee; Concrete Blonde; Holly Palmer. yeah.)
I caught the Lucky Star Chinatown bus Thursday morning (chosen because a: It has a really cute dragon mascot and b: it's a madonna song). The ride up to Boston was lovely. It's really clear to me that I was meant to live somewhere green, close to the coast. I don't think this is possible with a bookseller's salary. When we rode through Connecticut I found myself thinking that my mom should move up there. It's beautiful, she'd love it. AND she'd be very close to New York. Of course when we got to Massachusetts, I thought- no- she would love to live HERE instead.
Once in Boston, I rode the T to Haymarket and met up with Shawn. He took me to this fantastic Italian restaurant- Giacomo's. I had an amazing chicken parmigana. The neighborhood there is really charming, cobblestone streets, red brick everywhere... it's gorgeous. And clean. I think Miami and New York have screwed me up because when I find myself in a really pretty, clean town I think "This is so weird..." After we ate, we walked around a bit & even saw Christopher Columbus park, which is right on the harbor. It was great to see Shawn again after such a long time- I think it's been probably 9 years or so since we'd seen each other. We met up with his friends Mike & Derek outside of the Symphony Hall before the show. I was slightly bugged that the guy who took our tickets didn't even look twice at my bag- it meant I could have brought my camera after all. Grrr! The show started with a brief set of just The Pops playing. Keith Lockhart- kinda cute. Like Brian Kinney, but half as hot. The first song they played was "A New World" from SELMASONGS by Björk. I kinda wanted to cry. Then after they finished, there was a little intermission and finally, time for Aimee. Our seats were *really* good- an amazing view of Aimee, until she played piano on "King of the Jailhouse" which was alright, because it allowed me to focus on crushworthy Paul Bryan, who plays bass with her. I googled him last night & found out that he actually lives in Brooklyn, in Greenpoint! Plus, he's recorded his own album, "Handcuff King" that you can get from CDBABY. I put one of his songs up on my Myspace profile, but you can go directly to his page at www.paulbryan.us. My favorite songs they performed were "Lost in Space," "You're with Stupid Now" as well as "Video," which Aimee & her band performed without the Pops. The only complaint I can think of is of course that it was too short- but clearly I wished it could have gone on all night... and that "Nightmare Girl" had been one of the songs chosen. Post-show, we headed back to Shawn's home and basically passed out. I had been going on 4 hours of sleep Wednesday night and about the same amount on Tuesday.
Yesterday morning Shawn dropped me off at the commuter train in Framingham, which got me to the bus station just in time to catch the bus home. The ride back was mercifully shorter because there was less traffic. I had to sit next to someone and it was pretty cramped and miserable, but at least the scenery out the window was nice. I didn't read as much as I expected (X will be ashamed that I didn't finish V FOR VENDETTA) but I did listen to a lot of Aimee on my ipod.
I got home around 2:30. I made a nice meal for myself and watched the first season of the US Office, which I Netflixed. I was surprised that I'd actually seen more episodes than I thought, but there were only 6 after all. *sigh* Jim. *sigh* X+J have gone to Niagara Falls for the long weekend and Lily is up in D.C. with her friend, so it's just me. My big plans are to watch the rest of the movies in my Woody Allen box set (CRIMES & MISDEMEANOURS; ALICE; SHADOWS & FOG) and get a pizza. (With meatballs! yaay!!)

title quote: "You're with Stupid Now" by Aimee, from I'M WITH STUPID
music du jour: Paul Bryan
dvd player: CRIMES & MISDEMEANOURS
bookbag: V FOR VENDETTA (i suck!) & MIDDLESEX.
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

Weren't there two of them?

2006-06-29T02:01:00.000-04:00

PS: I also saw SUPERMAN RETURNS.
It's like this, there was one thing that I hated. Like, hate with a capital "F" hated. If I just don't think about that one thing, I realize that I loved the rest of the movie. Except that I thought they should have cast older actors for Lois & Clark. So... I give the movie a B. B-? No, no. a B. (B for Brandon Routh. Who's hotter with Brown eyes)

She has an abrasive look. I hope things go well for her.

2006-06-29T01:59:00.000-04:00

VOLVER. Absolutely wonderful. It is very much in the vein of TODO SOBRE MI MADRE- about women & the way they can be so set apart or the way they can completely come through for each other. Almodóvar knows about the ladies- according to Lily, "it's almost scary how much he understands women." Penelope Cruz is jawdroppingly good and definitely deserved the Best Actress award she picked up at Cannes. I've never found her more compelling. I felt that surprise you get when you see someone doing something you never thought they had in them- like Heath Ledger in BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN. Carmen Maura is absolutely amazing- and I was really happy to see one of my favorite Almodóvar players, Chus Lampreave, as Aunt Paula. She's 76 years old and still steals every scene that she's in.
What can I say, there's something about going to see a movie and actually feeling excitement when it begins. I definitely felt that way when the opening credits ran tonight. It's a sense of joy that occurs all too rarely, but I can now add Almodóvar to the list of artists who truly make me thrilled about seeing a movie.

*sigh* How long till SCOOP opens??

title quote: Pedro Almodóvar describing one of the actresses in the presskit for the film
music du jour: Travis
dvd player: MILDRED PIERCE
bookbag: READING SIX FEET UNDER
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

as long as there are stars above you

2006-06-27T00:14:00.000-04:00

long days, dammit!! ready for Wednesday night to just BE HERE already. anyway. i posted this on the myspace blog for some reason- that's the bs blog where i post about random shit like movies & music. so here:
thinking about how much can change in the course of a year. how much feelings towards people can change so completely. how unexpectedly friendships can blossom. (and wither) thinking back on your first impressions of people and being awed at how far you've come, how random meetings can never even hint at how important they will be to you. how people you thought loved you don't care as much as you believed, people you thought liked you clearly never did & the great surprise when someone you thought disliked you ends up being a good friend. thinking that if i could take some of it back, i'd want to- but then i wouldn't have ended up here, would i?

on another note, i've possibly discovered the first Woody Allen film that I don't like much. ANOTHER WOMAN. I had to stop it last night because A: I was falling asleep and B: I kept thinking, "END already!" :(

here we go: The 60s:
1. Beatles, "Yesterday"
2. Loretta Lynn, "Fist City"
3. Beatles, "Can't buy me love"
4. Beatles, "In my life"
5. Beatles, "Eleanor Rigby"
6. Loretta Lynn, "Woman of the world (Leave my man alone)"
7. Nina Simone, "I put a spell on you"
8. Beatles, "I want to hold your hand"
9. Beatles, "Day tripper"
10. Beatles, "All you need is love"
11. Beatles, "I saw her standing there"
12. Joni Mitchell, "Chelsea"
13. Loretta Lynn, "Happy Birthday"
14. Loretta Lynn, "You ain't woman enough (to take my man)"
15. Patsy Cline, "Sweet dreams (of you)"
16. Patsy Cline, "Crazy"
17. Paul Evans, "Happy-Go-Lucky-Me"
18. The Temptations, "The way you do the things you do"
19. Aretha Franklin, "Chain of fools"
20. Beach Boys, "Good vibrations"
21. Beach Boys, "Don't talk (Put your head on my shoulder)"
22. Beach Boys, "God only knows"
23. Beatles, "She loves you"
24. Beatles, "Help!"
25. Beatles, "Lucy in the sky with diamonds"

title quote: "God only knows"
music du jour: 50 ft. wave/Golden Ocean
dvd player: Woody Allen's ANOTHER WOMAN
bookbag: MIDDLESEX- ok it got better...
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

Everything they do is SO dramatic and flamboyant! It just makes me want to... set myself on fire!

2006-06-26T00:27:00.000-04:00

...or how The Gays Made Me Late To Work. Betrayed by my own people!!

So this morning before work, we were watching some episodes of The Office. I can't watch it for very long because it actually just makes me mad that there is no one in my life, or possibly reality, as ideal as this guy:

As I made my way to work I spent much of my time pondering the unfairness of a world that would let you imagine someone like Jim, but then laugh at your knowledge that there's no one like him anywhere. I was pleased to see that the train wasn't bypassing my destination stop this week, which it had been doing for the last few Sundays. I would be on time, and that's a good thing. I walk down 18th towards 5th and what do I see? Throngs of people lined up, watching the Big Gay Parade!! I walk down, thinking how nice it is to see my people, even if I tend to sit out Pride, self-loathing homosexual that I am. Ok, ok, I don't loathe myself. Just... you know. Other gay men. Anyway, the problem presents itself: How to get across 5th? There are barricades along the parade route. I look towards 19th. I look towards 17th. It seems to never end. So many gays. Nowhere for me to cross the street. I turn around and go BACK to the station, get on the L and of course end up at work 15 minutes LATE. But feeling vaguely proud.

BIG week(s):
Tuesday: SUPERMAN (maybe?)
Wednesday: screening of VOLVER with Lily.
Thursday: to Boston for Aimee Mann/Boston Pops with Shawn!!
PLUS I found out today that I get a surprise couple of days off to celebrate Independence Day!! (and of course when I say celebrate Independence Day, what I actually mean is stay in my pjs and watch Six Feet Under)

-rick
title quote: Lucille Bluth, ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT: Season One/Episode One
music du jour: Snow Patrol/EYES OPEN
dvd player: Woody Allen's ANOTHER WOMAN
bookbag: READING SIX FEET UNDER (I don't know if I'm going to be able to finish MIDDLESEX. I'm not feeling it.)
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

from here to there and everywhere and back to Union Square, when do i get some sleep?

2006-06-24T11:22:00.000-04:00

Bic Runga owns my ipod, no doubt.

top 25 songs from the 2000s:
1. Bic Runga, "If I had you"
2. Bic, "A day like today"
3. Bic, "Listen"
4. Bic, "It's over"
5. Bic, "Blue, blue heart"
6. Bic, "When I see you smile"
7. Bic, "Election night"
8. Bic, "Anyone who had a heart" (live)
9. Bic, "Precious things" (live)
10. Beth Thornley, "Mr. Lovely"
11. Bic, "Listening for the weather"
12. Bic, "And no more shall we part" (live)
13. Beth Thornley, "Stand"
14. Beth Thornley, "Once"
15. Bic, "Beautiful collision"
16. Bic, "Counting the days"
17. Bic, "Gracie"
18. Bic, "Beautiful collision" (live)
19. Bic, "Drive" (Cars cover)
20. Sia, "Breath me"
21. Beth Thornley, "Bound"
22. Bic, "Something good"
23. Bic, "Bursting through"
24. Fiona Apple, "Better version of me"
25. Snow Patrol, "Somewhere a clock is ticking"

so then I made a playlist of my top 25 songs sorted by genre- singer/songwriter. the difference is very slight:
1. Bic, "If I had you"
2. Bic, "A day like today"
3. Bic, "Listen"
4. Bic, "It's over"
5. Bic, "Blue blue heart"
6. Joan Armatrading, "The weakness in me"
7. Bic, "When I see you smile"
8. Bic, "Election night"
9. Bic, "Anyone who had a heart" (live)
10. Beth Thornley, "Mr. Lovely"
11. Bic, "Listening for the weather"
12. Bic, "And no more shall we part" (live)
13. Bic, "Drive"
14. Bic, "Suddenly strange"
15. Beth Thornley, "Stand"
16. Beth Thornley, "Once"
17. Bic, "Beautiful collision"
18. Bic, "Counting the days"
19. Bic, "Gracie"
20. Bic, "Beautiful collision" (live)
21. Bic, "Sway"
22. Bic, "Hey"
23. Bic, "Drive" (Cars cover)
24. Beth Thornley, "Bound"
25. Bic, "Something good"

keeping in mind that i also have Indigo Girls, Aimee Mann, Holly Palmer, Joni Mitchell & Ben Folds sorted in the singer/songwriter category, i think it's surprising that NONE of them even make an appearance on the 25 most played songs in that genre. i guess it also says something about how much i love Beth Thornley's "My Glass Eye" album... which incidentally i've only had since like, May. my favorite playlist is called "Songs I Know By Heart" and includes every Bic Runga and Travis song on my ipod... but still, Travis doesn't show up as much on most of my playlists. Until...

top 25 British Rock tracks:
1. Blur, "Song 2"
2. Snow Patrol, "Somewhere a clock is ticking"
3. Travis, "All I want to do is rock"
4. Travis, "Don't be shy"
5. Blur, "There's no other way"
6. Snow Patrol, "How to be dead"
7. Blur, "Beetlebum"
8. Travis, "Re-Offender" (really?? only #8?!?)
9. Travis, "Know nothing"
10. Travis, "Sing"
11. Travis, "Afterglow"
12. Travis, "The fear"
13. Travis, "Driftwood"
14. Bloc Party, "Like eating glass"
15. Travis, "Love will come through"
16. Travis, "Happy to hang around"
17. Travis, "Dear Diary"
18. Travis, "Side"
19. Travis, "The last laugh of the laughter"
20. Travis, "Turn"
21. Bloc Party, "Helicopter"
22. Blur, "Coffee & TV"
23. Blur, "Parklife" (David's song!)
24. Blur, "Girls & Boys"
25. Keane, "The Frog Prince" (and i've had the album for like 3 days...)

watching my Woody Allen box. no surprise that i absolutely loved The Purple Rose of Cairo... all so good. my favorite line from any of the films so far has to be "If Jesus came back and saw what was going on in his name, he would never stop throwing up." I agree. Plus, the line is said by Max Von Sydow, which for some reason makes it even better to me.

title quote: Bic Runga, "Get Some Sleep" from Beautiful Collision.
music du jour: Snow Patrol, Eyes Open
dvd player: Radio Days
bookbag: Middlesex
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

even the things that seem still are still changing

2006-06-23T00:15:00.000-04:00

top 25 songs from the 90s on my ipod:
1. Blur- "Song 2"
2. Three Finger Cowboy- "Everybody Knows"
3. Bic Runga- "Drive"
4. Bic- "Suddenly Strange"
5. Throwing Muses- "Bright Yellow Gun"
6. Save Ferris- "Come On Eileen"
7. The Specials- "Pressure Drop"
8. Barenaked Ladies- "One Week"
9. Bic- "Sway"
10. Bic- "Hey"
11. Cathy Richardson- "Saturday"
12. Reel Big Fish- "Take On Me"
13. Third Eye Blind- "Semi-Charmed Life"
14. Bic with Dan Wilson- "Good Morning, Baby"
15. Bic- "Swim"
16. Bic- "Delight"
17. Bic- "All Fall Down"
18. Mary Lou Lord- "Some Jingle Jangle Morning"
19. Nerf Herder- "Sorry"
20. Semisonic- "F.N.T."
21. Smashmouth- "All Star"
22. Spin Doctors- "Jimmy Olsen's Blues"
23. Sublime- "Santeria"
24. Travis- "All I Want to Do Is Rock"
25. Bic- "Roll Into One"

title quote: Ben Folds, "Still" from OVER THE HEDGE
music du jour: Keane/Under the Iron Sea
dvd player: A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy
bookbag: Jeffrey Eugenides, MIDDLESEX
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

sometimes you have to look very hard at a person & remember he's doing the best he can.

2006-06-22T01:52:00.000-04:00

I felt myself give up on someone today. No big drama. In fact, she'll probably never realize it. The truths that I'm learning: People will disappoint you. Friends will let you down. You have to understand at some point that it's time to stop trying or making excuses, wish them well and move on.

It's like you get to be John Wayne as an adult.

2006-06-22T01:28:00.000-04:00

...not John Wayne as a little kid...

No matter how much it sucked, I still had fun.

we live & learn from our mistakes

2006-06-21T20:02:00.000-04:00

top 25 80s songs on my ipod:
1. Joan Armatrading/The Weakness in Me
2. Joan Jett & the Blackhearts/Bad Reputation
3. Talking Heads/Thank You for Sending Me an Angel (live)
4. Joan Jett & the Blackhearts/I Love Rock N'Roll
5. Indigo Girls/Prince of Darkness
6. Talking Heads/And She Was
7. Talking Heads/The Lady Don't Mind
8. Talking Heads/Stay Up Late
9. Talking Heads/Psycho Killer (live)
10. The Cars/You Might Think
11. The DiVinyls/Only Lonely
12. Dolly Parton/Hard Candy Christmas
13. Indigo Girls/Never Stop
14. Jennifer Holliday/And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going
15. Concrete Blonde/It's Only Money
16. Lucinda Williams/Passionate Kisses
17. Michael Penn/No Myth
18. Pat Benatar/All Fired Up
19. The Pretenders/Don't Get Me Wrong
20. R.E.M./(Don't Go Back To) Rockville
21. Sting/Moon Over Bourbon Street
22. Talking Heads/Blind
23. Talking Heads/Heaven (live)
24. Talking Heads/This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody) (live)
25. War/Low Rider (remix)

What's the up-chuck factor on that?

2006-06-21T08:13:00.000-04:00

Oh cute online guy- why must you list things such as: Favorite book- The Da Vinci Code and Favorite films- Crash?

hmmm. i have very fucked up standards. good thing i'm not actually planning on meeting anyone. cuz... other people? no longer for me. you never know how psychotic & petty they are under the surface.

feeling blah- ought to be on the way to work already, but not ready to go. kinda wish i could change my work schedule so that i could open during the weekend & avoid the whole crowded train situation. co-worker joked that it's ironic that the agoraphobic bookseller is now in charge of books on travel. not feeling very enthusiastic. tired. upsetting dream last night, that i won't even go into here so- you know it wasn't good. psyched only for next week's Almodóvar/Aimee Mann days. already sort of questioning the decision to stay. miss my mom. miss my brother. miss central a/c. think i've put myself in a situation where it will be even harder to say goodbye.

argh.

title quote: HEATHERS
music du jour: Holly Palmer
dvd player: watched STARDUST MEMORIES last night. A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S SEX COMEDY is next.
bookbag: about to finish Fonda's MY LIFE SO FAR. I'll miss her when it's over.
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

¿Qué he hecho yo para merecer esto!!

2006-06-19T23:53:00.000-04:00

So I just found out that my friend has gotten us into a screening of the new Almodóvar film, VOLVER! AND it's the very night before I go to Boston to see Aimee Mann with Shawn! Good stuff.

Top 25 songs from the 70s on my ipod:
1- Elvis Costello, "Mystery Dance'
2- Loretta Lynn, "She's Got You"
3- Joni Mitchell, "All I Want"
4- Talking Heads, "Animals"
5- ABBA, "S.O.S.'
6- Al Green, "How Can You Mend a Broken Heart?"
7- Aretha Franklin, "Bridge Over Troubled Water"
8- Cat Stevens, "If You Want to Sing Out, Sing Out"
9- Dolly Parton, "I Will Always Love You"
10- The Doors, "Love Her Madly"
11- Heart, "Magic Man"
12- Joni Mitchell, "My Old Man"
13- Joni Mitchell, "Little Green"
14- Joni Mitchell, "Help Me"
15- Joni Mitchell, "Let the Wind Carry Me"
16- Loretta Lynn, "Coal Miner's Daughter"
17- Loretta Lynn, "Louisiana Woman, Mississippi Man"
18- Neil Young, "Don't Let It Bring You Down"
19- Talking Heads, "Memories Can't Wait"
20- Talking Heads, "Electric Guitar"
21- Talking Heads, "With Our Love"
22- Talking Heads, "The Good Thing"
23- The Who, "Baba O'Riley"
24- ABBA, "Ring Ring"
25- ABBA, "Fernando"

title quote: Pedro Almodóvar film
music du jour: biggest surprise: Bon Jovi- Lay Your Hands on Me
dvd player: Woody Allen's MANHATTAN
bookbag: Jane Fonda's MY LIFE SO FAR
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

There's a giant tit on the loose!!

2006-06-18T12:17:00.000-04:00

...And that tit is ME. Oh my god. Awkward story. This weekend we have a visitor, a friend of X's. Not just a friend, but the friend who was possibly going to room with them when I left. Only now... not leaving. I had known that she was going to come up for a weekend, but had no clue that it was *this* weekend until about 2 AM Saturday morning. My first thought was: I should have just gone to DC with Lily and called out Sunday, fuck the consequences. My second thought was: This. Is. Going. To. Be. SO. Awkward. Because let's face it, kids- I'm the asshole who has decided at the last minute that I'm not leaving and the reason that she has to schlep around the city looking at places today.

Saturday afternoon. I had been out of my room a couple of times- shower, chocolate milk, snacks... but not seen X or J at all. I was watching movies from my new Woody Allen box set(s) all day, so my door had been closed, my noisy fan on high. I'm watching Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex *But Were Afraid to Ask and was at the penultimate scene where Woody is at the mad scientist's castle & there's a giant breast attacking him. A knock at the door & it's X. He looks at the tv set quizzically and I shout a line from the movie: "There's a giant tit on the loose!!" X freezes and then says, "...we have company."

I am mortified.
Because now I'm not just the asshole who stayed, but I'm also the guy who shouts out "There's a giant tit on the loose!"

TIT.

I spend the rest of the day in my room, door closed, cursing Woody Allen even as I applaud his genius.

title quote: Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex *But were afraid to ask
music du jour: tbd
dvd player: Interiors
bookbag: My Life So Far by Jane Fonda
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

you make quite a flame, my bright bottle rocket!

2006-06-16T16:35:00.000-04:00

Go see Beth Thornley if you're in Los Angeles. OR I'LL KILL YOU!

i feel like i'm taking crazy pills!

2006-06-16T16:11:00.000-04:00

because i listened to that damn Christina Aguilera song over & over again all the way to the grocery store this afternoon.

anyway.
Finished the last episode of Tales from Avonlea.
Went to buy groceries.
Talked to Dave about Orson Welles and told him that he (and everyone else) MUST read the National Treasure review on pictures & frames- www.picturesandframes.com
Showered.
Did the dishes, while listening to Holly Palmer.
Cooked lunch (Dirty rice!)
Watched this movie I TIVOed last week, but haven't had the chance to see yet- The Divorcee with Norma Shearer. Why do I love Norma so? Is it because she too is a wonky-eyed drama queen? Whatever it is, I adore her. AND added bonus- one of her co-stars in this film is Robert Montgomery, who was one of the most handsome and charming stars of early cinema. My first Norma sighting was a film they starred in together called PRIVATE LIVES- It's one of my favorite films ever & I think one of the funniest films ever.

It's Woody Allen weekend after this. There's a special at work- buy 2 dvds & get a 3rd free... I bought all three Woody Allen collections (with discounts and the free set I saved about 100 bucks!!) I may watch MATCH POINT first- which I've had since it was released, only haven't seen yet. (I need to use my last week of vacation to just stay at home, in my room and catch up on my movie-watching!) I'm excited as there are several films in the collections that I've never seen.

Missing Lily this weekend- She had asked me to go with her to a film festival in DC, but with a week's notice I couldn't find anyone to switch shifts with, so... bleh. I AM however going on a trip later this month- to Boston to see Aimee Mann play with the Boston Pops with my friend Shawn. Woo-hoo!!

Ok I'm off...
title quote: ZOOLANDER
music du jour: Holly Palmer/Songs For Tuesday
dvd player: MATCH POINT
bookbag: MY LIFE SO FAR/Jane Fonda
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

i can taste it, too!!

2006-06-16T02:10:00.000-04:00

So I have something shameful to admit.

I really dislike Christina Aguilera. (No that wasn't the shameful part. although as a 'mo i know that i'm expected to love her and shit...) I have never liked her very much. I think she, like most singers today, does too much- vocal acrobatic kinda shit... I like people who can just sing a song, simply and beautifully. So the other day, when I saw the episode of FAMILY GUY where Peter is her manager & complains that she offends all five senses, including his sense of taste (Peter: "You know how sometimes something smells so bad that you can taste it?" Xtina: "I can taste it, too!") I was laughing my ass off, because she really does put me off that much.

And then X forced me to watch the rest of the MTV Movie Awards. I had wanted to watch because a singer that I have a LOT of respect for, someone who can sing with style and verve and blow you away when you see her live, Holly Palmer, is currently singing with the group Gnarls Barkley, who performed at the show. Now, I think I might have said recently that it sort of bums me out that Gnarls Barkley is getting all this credit, all this play, for something that I find incredibly underwhelming and that Holly is pretty much "oohing" and "ahhing" in the background (often in ridiculous costumes like, towels or rebel fighter uniform-including helmet) when her music is something special & she really deserves to be the one in the spotlight... ok ok i'm bitter and need to realize what an incredible opportunity it is for her, so we'll move on. ANYway after watching the performance, X made me watch the rest of the award show (did I mention that he loves Jessica Alba? He does.) It was pretty ridiculous, as the MTV Movie Awards usually is. I felt like Fiona Apple, wanting to shout out "This world is BULLSHIT!!" but let's face it, X would probably just set me alight with the dragon lighter. So I persevered. And then something surprising happened... Christina Aguilera performed her new song. And... there were actual musicians on stage. Brass players. And it was... pretty. fucking. awesome. Now, I'm not going to become a fan & start typing shit like *I love Xtina* Because A: It's just undeniably a great song, but it's still one song. and B: I still hate everything that came before this one song. But I have to say, it was one of those showstopping performances that one might expect from Madonna about 15 years ago, Janet Jackson 10 years ago... Good job. dammit.

and i am telling you i'm not going

2006-06-16T01:21:00.000-04:00

So yeah, I'm staying till the first week of November.

Have the weekend off. Going to watch Woody Allen movies and do nothing else. (Although yesterday I saw DISTRICT B-13 and it was freaking AWESOME!)

Meanest thing that I said today- "If there was a burning building and I had to choose between saving Julia Roberts & Sandra Bullock, I would TOTALLY save Sandra. She's just so much more likeable."

of course yesterday I compared Brittany Murphy to a horse.

and those are just the mean things I said about people I don't know.

title quote: from DREAMGIRLS... the show, not the movie. I have reservations about the movie.
music du jour: shuffled a lot- the ipod favored Heart today as I heard three different songs by them. hooray!
dvd player: TALES FROM AVONLEA: Season One
bookbag: MY LIFE SO FAR by Jane Fonda
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

you know how i know you're gay?

2006-06-12T02:37:00.000-04:00

you're watching the Tony Awards.

so here's what. I thought Michael Cerveris & Patti LuPone and more importantly, SWEENEY TODD for best revival were robbed. BUT I think it's cool that they're awarding new blood... even if JERSEY BOYS & THE COLOR PURPLE are two shows I have no interest in seeing.
You know, there wasn't really a performance that made me think- I HAVE TO SEE THAT SHOW!! Which is disappointing because this is the one year when I'm watching the Tonys and actually COULD go see a show! Nothing as exciting as seeing Sutton Foster sing "Forget About the Boy" from THOROUGHLY MODERN MILLIE, Idina Menzel sing "Defying Gravity" from WICKED (which I did get to see & loved) or Norbert Leo Butz doing "Great Big Stuff" from DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS (which i've seen twice now & could see again and again. who hasn't seen it and wants to go??).

Loved seeing Audrey McDonald, but I wish she had the chance to sing.
Julia Roberts? Make it about you, honey... always make it about you.
Paul Rudd wants to marry me.
Molly Ringwald? A little scary.
Ralph Fiennes? Hotter in person. What's cool is that I can say that I saw a Tony-winning performance since Ian McDiarmid won for FAITH HEALER. Awesome.

title quote: THE 40 YEAR OLD VIRGIN
music du jour: a lot of Dixie Chicks/Beth Thornley
dvd player: TALES FROM AVONLEA: Season One
bookbag: MY LIFE SO FAR by Jane Fonda
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-17

"ask her questions!" "what's 7x7?" "Stuff she KNOWS!"

2006-06-08T23:46:00.000-04:00

Jeremy Sisto sighting. I wanted to drop down and propose.

title quote: CLUELESS
music du jour: Holly Palmer
dvd player: QUEER AS FOLK: Season Five
bookbag: Jane Fonda's MY LIFE SO FAR
celebrity sightings: 1
YTD Sightings-17

you said you'd say goodbye/you should try & prove you right.

2006-06-08T00:42:00.000-04:00

Oh man the rain is bringing me DOWN! It was raining when I left this morning and raining when I left work this afternoon. Got home, so tired. Made some leftover pasta. Watched some tv with J, and later X. Hung out with Lily ragging on movies and old tv shows. Work flew by today, which was nice. Oh- and yesterday I finally got a haircut. Happy now.

title quote: Beth Thornley, "Mr. Lovely" from MY GLASS EYE
music du jour: Holly Palmer; Beth Thornley; Raconteurs; Dixie Chicks; Ben Folds
dvd player: Dead Birds. Tonight I may even get to finish it.
bookbag: Finished re-reading CLAIRE MARVEL. Next up, either V FOR VENDETTA or Fonda biography.
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-16

I've dated uglier girls than you for breakfast!!

2006-06-05T00:42:00.000-04:00

I'm such a freak, it's not even funny. I am actually taking Tuesday off. I didn't even have to make up an excuse or lie- I just said "Is there any way I can not be here on Tuesday?" O Captain My Captain took a look at the schedule and said "Sure" So I'll be doing my laundry and then probably watching Jackie Brown should the Apocalypse come. It's retarded- I'm never superstitous... Friday the 13th? Whatever. Plus, you know... there was a June 6, 1906. and June 6, 1806... and for that matter wasn't there a June 6, 6??

Anyway. Tonight was not a fun closing. Too much going on, I was in a sort of bitchy mood to begin with (happens every Sunday) and we were a bit shorthanded. Came home and watched an episode of Family Guy, which really cheered me up. Now I'm going to watch a bit of Avonlea before bed, imagining a simpler, more gentle time and dreaming about living on Prince Edward Island.

-rick
title quote: KOGARTH OF BARBARIA
music moment du jour: Listening to Bic Runga singing "A Day Like Today" and Material Issue's "A Very Good Idea" as I wandered down 8th street on my way to work.
dvd player: Tales of Avonlea: Season One
bookbag: John Burnham Schwartz: Claire Marvel. (I got the advance for this novel years ago and it was just lovely. Last month I decided to list it as my staff recommendation and it actually sold out. I'm re-reading it.)
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-16

there must be some other door that they are saving behind which my happiness lies

2006-06-04T12:01:00.000-04:00

An interesting week. For the last month or so, I've been arguing with the voice in my head that says "I'm not ready to leave..." Then last week I said out loud, probably two or three times, "I don't want to go yet!" So there's some big contemplating going on, about possibly staying in NYC until November rather than leaving in July. It's sorta short notice, being only a month away from when I was originally planning on leaving. I've talked to my family & my roommates and will talk to my boss this week to see if I can defer my transfer till then. Which will probably not be a problem, because he seemed sad to see me go. I just feel like something here is unfinished, like this experience needs to last a little longer. Missing my family still hurts- and thinking about not seeing them for another 5 months hits me every time. I can't put my finger on what it is exactly that's telling me to stick it out. Is it because Miami in summer is hell on earth & I'd rather wait for it to cool down? Is it because I'd like to see a little bit of Autumn in New York again before I leave? Is it because Julianne Moore will be doing a show here in October? Matty will be here for one day in September? Or will it actually be detrimental to stay, because it will make it even harder to leave the flat, X+J, Lily, Norana, Gilliane, working at a place I like, with people who seem to like me (mostly)? Another benefit of staying till then is that my vacation hours are refreshed in October. Which means I would have one week before then to take off and spend however I please- and then a lot more time to deal with the move home, some time to spend with my family once I get there rather than jumping right back into work. If we planned it right, we could even have time to go up to my Granny's for her birthday on November 13th. I think it may be a good plan.

In other news, I watched more movies with X last night- Joyride, which I had seen & loved before. I always think of Matty's line about "two scoops of vanilla ice cream" when Paul Walker & Steve Zahn are walking into the diner naked. We also watched Oldboy, which has been at the house since Christmas, I think. It was pretty cool. Some shocking images, and hard to follow until things click- and then you realize that you've just seen a Greek Tragedy done up Korean style. I can't deal with the octopus thing, though. I did find the giant ant amusing, but X was freaked out. Oh, you kids and your fear of giant ants.

I kinda want to skip work on Tuesday. I'm apparently superstitious because the whole 6.06.06 thing? Kinda freaking me out. I feel like I'd rather be in Brooklyn for the Apocalypse than in Manhattan, where the sinner to saint ratio is probably higher. But what excuse would I give? Fear of God's wrath?

-rick
title quote: 'til tuesday, "believed you were lucky" from EVERYTHING'S DIFFERENT NOW
music du jour: Holly Palmer. In my head. On my ipod. Everywhere.
dvd player: Tales From Avonlea: Season One
bookbag: Jonathan Burnham Schwartz: Claire Marvel
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-16

i should've known/the writing was upon the stall/i should've known/that rome was starting to fall

2006-06-01T00:58:00.000-04:00

X-Men: The Last Stand is like Carrie, without the prom. no seriously, I originally was saying that it's like 40% good, 60% crap, but then X+I decided that it's more like 10% good, 30% alright and 60% suck. these are my favorite comic book movies, why must they get screwed up like this?!? never, at any point during the first two XMEN movies did I feel like there was anything crappy/cheesy onscreen. with this one i was cringing every other minute. oh my GOD the villains? so fucking lame... it's not all the hack director, either. it's the screenplay... and the design- the character designs for the bad guys was laughable and awful and ridiculous and bugger it all to hell.

on the bright side, i finished the last Harry Potter book. so now I realize that I did this all wrong... I should have waited till the last book was due because now i will be one of those sorry bastards who has to WAIT FOR THE CONCLUSION!!!!! dammit. i think i'll read my Jane Fonda bio next.

but for now, i'm going to watch Peter Sarsgaard in the Dying Gaul. even if it sucks, Sarsgaard=hot enough to make me forget how bad XMEN was.

Looks like Friday night Lily, JM & Marta are going to watch L'Appartement with me. Love. That. Movie.

alright, I'm off. (did i mention the part where i spilled Kool Aid all over my laptop?)

title quote: Aimee Mann, "I Should've Known" from WHATEVER
music du jour: my singer/songwriters playlist & The Dixie Chicks: TAKING THE LONG WAY AROUND
dvd player: The Dying Gaul (upon Lily's insistence)
bookbag: Fonda!
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-16

oh, ass.

2006-05-30T04:02:00.000-04:00

when you read things... on the internet... bad stuff can happen.

like finding out something that occurs in X-Men before you see the movie. which you don't have very high hopes for in the first place due to the whole Brett Ratner thing.

bugger.

worked today, got home, showered, watched an episode of X-Files, turned off the lights and went to sleep around 9:30.

and now it's 4 AM and i'm totally awake. and i have to get up in 5 hours to do it all over again.

wipe that face off your head, bitch!

2006-05-28T23:53:00.000-04:00

Ok, so I did a bad, bad thing tonight at work. I walked past the writing aisle and saw books everywhere on the floor, misplaced on the shelf. a mess. So I fixed it, and then realized that they'd left a Sephora bag... (theoretically it was the same person. i hope it was) I brought the bag to the desk and put a note on it saying something like- "Lost & Found, 2nd Floor. They probably didn't see it among all of the books they left on the floor." Fifteen minutes or so later, carrie bradshaw shows up and asks if we've found her bag. I hand it to her & help the next customer. And... the note was still on it. And... not because I'd forgotten to take it off, but because I felt that she should know.

oh yeah, I also took a trip to the Deli for a Hershey's bar & a Dr. Pepper an hour after getting back from the break I was 5 minutes late returning from. Tonight sucked.

life could be lovely/life could be fucking great

2006-05-28T11:59:00.000-04:00

oh life... why must you toy with me? late last night (after watching The Exorcism of Emily Rose!) a friend caught me online and asked what I was doing on June 28th- because he has an extra ticket to see Aimee Mann playing with the Boston Pops. Aimee Mann! She's been my favorite since high school, but I have never seen her play. Much less with an orchestra. But of course: *I'm broke *it's in Boston. *It would mean taking two days off from work & I have no wiggle room with vacation days because it all has to go towards the week I move which is the week right after the Aimee show. argh. I haven't seen my friend Shawn since like 1997 or something. I really wanted to visit Boston at some point. The recurring theme in my life right now is that there's never enough time (or money). Whether it's a weekend that flies by or a year. Also, why is everything/everyone cool located so very far away from Florida??

hmmph.

title quote: 'til tuesday, "Believed you were lucky" from EVERYTHING'S DIFFERENT NOW. (best album ever?)
music du jour: Today feels like some Aimee, some Holly and that song by The Devlins that I found.
dvd player: The X-Files: Season One, disc 1
bookbag: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-16

if i choose now/i'll lose out/one of you has to fall/but i need you/and you...

2006-05-26T01:57:00.000-04:00

grr. and argh. i've spent the last 24 hours or so feeling sort of upset and conflicted about going back to Florida. It's so hard being away from my family and it's been the source of a lot of depression... but then thinking about returning to a city i don't like, leaving a job that i enjoy to go back to the place i couldn't stand and abandoning all my friends makes me feel just as bad. i feel like there's no way i can win. i'm stuck in a catch 22 and it sucks. i need a hug, dammit.

and it doesn't help that there's this documentary on about 12 year olds and the popular kids are talking shit about the outsiders- who are already much cooler than they are. it's not cool that the interviewer is creating friction between two of the girls, either. and the narration is awful. i need to turn this off. can't. stop. looking!! "if you don't dress right, then you don't fit in. if you don't fit in, then you can't get popular."

title quote: Joan Armatrading, "The Weakness in Me"
feeling guilty/worried/waking from tormented sleep/this old love has me bound/but the new love cuts deep
if i choose now/i'll lose out/one of you has to fall/but i need you/and you...

did you find romance? of course you did. that's why they call it Rome.

2006-05-26T00:17:00.000-04:00

Dear Diary,
Today Hot J- said I was cute. No lie.

Holly Palmer rocked!

Okay so this morning I watched the episode of Conan O'Brien that we TiVoed last night because Holly, who is on tour with Gnarls Barkley was on. Kinda upsetting actually. Watching her sing backups for them when I really feel like she should be the one promoting her album on Conan just sort of pissed me off. Hmmph.

title quote: Holly Palmer, "that's why they call it Rome" from Songs for Tuesday
music du jour: guess.
dvd player: CONSTANTINE (?)
bookbag: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. woo-hoo!
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-16

that's not a knife. THIS is a knife

2006-05-25T10:56:00.000-04:00

did i forget to mention how much i totally hated Wolf Creek?

can anybody suggest a scary movie that's actually *SCARY*?? Like, Exorcist/The Ring/Nightmare on Elm Street scary, not just "this is really painful to watch/uncomfortable/gory, but not scary" like. X has decided to try The Exorcism of Emily Rose, so maybe that'll do it...

title quote: Crocodile Dundee/Wolf Creek
music du jour: Brand new music playlist includes:
*Beth Thornley
*Holly Palmer/Songs for Tuesday
*The Raconteurs/Broken Boy Soldiers (I *heart* Brendan Benson)
*Ben Folds/Over the Hedge
dvd player: oh my god i wish i had time to watch a dvd. tonight i will hopefully watch the last hour of 24 & Alias. Not to mention Veronica Mars & Lost are waiting to be seen, but I think that'll be tomorrow night's Korner Pizza viewing. I literally have a stack of dvds that I haven't been able to watch- a couple that have been there since CHRISTMAS. i need a million dollars so i can just quit working and watch dvds all day long...
bookbag: Harry Potter and... (TBD, I'm going to try to finish Order of the Phoenix right now)
celebrity sightings: 0 (i'm still in bed, though... maybe Lee Pace is hanging out in the kitchen...)
YTD Sightings-16

the city's a great big toy/just made for a girl and boy/we'll turn manhattan/into an isle of joy

2006-05-24T23:13:00.000-04:00

Downtown from the ferry to the Statue of Liberty on a very grey day.

Downtown as seen from the Empire State Building. Very, very, very, very, very high up...

The Chrysler Building, but more importantly, the very creepy seeming Roosevelt Island. I have to visit there before I head back to Florida.

The Holly Palmer pics will be up as soon as X helps me clear up a crazy red eye situation...

Baby, Bon Appetit

2006-05-24T21:33:00.000-04:00

Well, where did I leave off? Yeah. Sunday. Well, Monday we got up and met Sharon's friend Elena for lunch at Burger Heaven (GREAT burgers, but it's still impossible to beat Cozy's) and then went to MoMA. I had been there once before for a photography exhibit with X+J, but we didn't really venture into the other galleries, so it was wonderful to really wander around for a few hours. Keep in mind that I know like NOTHING about art, but my favorites were:
*Kandinsky
*Kahlo (one piece, but still so amazing)
*Umberto Boccioni (Farewells; Those Who Leave; Those Who Stay)
*Francis Bacon
*René Magritte (Empire of Light II)
*Chagall (I and the Village)
*Klimt
*I also loved the painting, "Christine's World" but can't remember the artist.

Right, so then we headed to the Carnegie Deli, but couldn't order as the minimum per person is like 12 bucks. Tried to find tickets to a show, but they were really pricey, even at half off. Went for dessert at the Euro Diner, then did a little Bacon-seeking. Oh, and yes- Central Park as well. Cab ride to the Guggenheim, but it was covered in scaffolding dammit. Dinner at Cozy's (another burger for me) then home, where we watched an episode of Queer as Folk because Sharon is as obsessed with it as Lily. Tuesday morning (was it only yesterday??) I had to get up and say goodbye before work... Then worked till 7:30, got on the train to go home and change clothes before going back out to Arlene's Grocery to see Holly Palmer play. I LOVE Holly and I think last night's show cemented the fact that she is one of my absolute favorite musicians, right up there with Bic, Travis, Indigo Girls & Aimee Mann. This girl's voice is fucking awesome. Plus, she started off by playing 3 songs on her acoustic guitar, no other accompaniment... two of those songs are from I CONFESS and are both ultra-produced on the album, so I had no concept of what they would sound like live... much less stripped down to the basics of voice/guitar. It was so fucking cool- a real insight into her songwriting process, like this must be the way they sound when they're first 'born' or something. She did my current favorite, "That's why they call it Rome" which was awesome, told a story about Sarah Vaughan, which was cool because she had recommended a Sarah album to me earlier this year that I fell in love with, so... yeah it was great. PLUS her band was sort of winging it, so it was amazing to watch the silent communication between Holly and the guys during songs- particularly Shawn Pelton, who played drums... AAUGGH!! It was just awesome and I am so so so glad that I decided to go even though it meant going alone. Anyway, after the show I talked to her for like, a minute and got the set list. I bought two copies of the album, since it was about half the price I expected it to be. Gotta support her. Which is why I'm going to tell you all to check her out on myspace right now: myspace.com/hollypalmer

So high after the show that I couldn't sleep till 2:30 this morning- and had my alarm set for 7:30. Clearly the work day was long and I got home exhausted. Picked up some dinner, read a little Harry Potter and now I'm going to shower and catch up on Alias/24.
title quote: Holly Palmer, "Did Your Mama?" from I CONFESS
music du jour: Holly Palmer, SONGS FOR TUESDAY
dvd player: MUNICH
bookbag: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (so close... soooo close!!!!)
celebrity sightings: (duh)
YTD Sightings-16

her milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.

2006-05-22T10:23:00.000-04:00

i'm much higher than i thought i'd be (don't look down, don't look down)

2006-05-22T00:44:00.000-04:00

The day started in a really nice way. Nothing major or gigantic, but a nice warm feeling all over kinda way.

So my cousin Chuck is in town with her friend Sharon and we have been out doing all the touristy stuff I haven't really done. We rode the ferry around the Statue of Liberty (after the dumbass 1 train messed with my whole "it's going to be so easy to get there and back to Christopher Street!" plan). I was a little concerned with it being cold/windy/rainy since I've been fighting a cold this week, but honestly i was so psyched just to be out on the water that it didn't matter. It's interesting- yesterday when I saw The New World, there's a scene that takes place next to the ocean, with these pounding waves... It kinda reminded me of the cliffs where the lighthouse was in Avonlea (hi, obscure Canadian tv reference) and I just thought, "Why can't I live there?" I love being out on the water, there's something amazingly calming about it, even when the sea's a bit rough like it was today. Anyway... from there we headed back uptown, grabbed some lunch at the Hollywood Diner while the rain wore off. Headed to Christopher Street- the park, check. the Stonewall, check. Oscar Wilde bookstore, check. The train stop that brings back bad memories of weekend from hell, check. Repress. REPRESS! Success.
Next stop was the Empire State Building. So the thing is that I pretty much thought I would never ever EVER go there. I hate elevators. I hate heights. I fear acts of terror. These three things presumably assured that I wouldn't make that particular trip. I think I even mentioned in an e-mail before they got here that I'd probably drop them off and then go like, read a book or something. But I figured, if not now, when? So I did it. And the elevator? Really fucking crowded. The observatory? Really fucking high up. I think I got some really cool shots too, despite the serious palm sweat situation.
After conquering my fears, I treated myself to a hot chocolate at Starbucks and we headed on to Times Square. I picked up an I *Heart* New York t-shirt, because I didn't have one yet and I do in fact, *Heart* NY. I will not miss Times Square, or much of midtown, even though I'll miss the opportunities to see kickass shows. We ended the day with drinks at the Pig & Whistle (cute bartender with an accent who sang along to Robbie Williams' "Rock DJ" is a bonus) and arrived back home to find that J made cookies. A very good day indeed.

title quote: Tanya Donelly, "clipped" from Lovesongs for Underdogs
music du jour: Beth Thornley in my head all day- oh... and Barry White
dvd player: KINSEY, but I haven't watched it yet.
bookbag: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
celebrity sightings: 0 (but apparently if there's the chance that Stockard Channing is nearby, I go crazy with excitement)
YTD Sightings-15

oh, you stupid thing...

2006-05-19T15:12:00.000-04:00

Dear Mischa Barton,
Please remember that those who do not know history are doomed to repeat it. I'd like to suggest that you google the following name immediately: David Caruso. Beware. Be-fucking-ware. Because unlike you, my sad little meatless child, Caruso was not an unattractive talentless stick figure. That guy had at least some potential. And look what happened to him when he decided to leave his hit television show.
Anyway. Good luck with that. I'll see you on next year's THE SURREAL LIFE with Tanya Harding and Nicole Ritchie.
xxoo
Rick

title quote: Aimee Mann, "Stupid Thing" from WHATEVER
music du jour: Beth Thornley, MY GLASS EYE. which reminds me of the old joke about my unfocused eye being the audience for my blog. good times...
dvd player: THE UGLIEST DVD EVER. thanks to X.
bookbag: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. (look i'm already a slow reader and the book is like five zillion pages long!)
celebrity sightings: 0- like anyone worth seeing was hanging out at the Snow White Laundromat or Regina Pizza? no.
YTD Sightings-15

sleeping and waking are the hardest things to do

2006-05-19T01:33:00.000-04:00

So yesterday I totally had mojo. Today? not so much...

I went to bed around 2:30 am, took some Sudafed because I've been feeling like a cold is coming on. I woke up this morning feeling refreshed, but thinking that I slept late, maybe to 11:30 or so.

It was 2:11 pm. I was supposed to be at work at 2:00. bleh...

then it was just an alright day, nothing too bad. plus, i got to work with some of my favorite co-workers today and that always makes it all better. it wasn't till i got home though that i got really happy- turns out that Holly Palmer is going to be playing here on Tuesday night at this place called Arlene's Grocery. I work till 7:30 that night and open the next day, but it's HOLLY PALMER!! I saw her once, in like 1997 when she opened for Paula Cole & I had no idea who she was. She impressed me, though- I bought her album and a tee and became a big fan. I endured the LONG ASS WAIT between "Holly Palmer" and "I Confess" and have been stalking her Myspace page for info on the upcoming "Songs for Tuesday."

my point is that if I go to one show this year, it's going to be this one. ...and I'll probably be going alone, but fuck it. It's Holly.

So I'm off for the next four days- My cousin Chuck is going to be in town for the 2nd half of my long weekend. Tomorrow I'll be doing laundry (a great excuse to read Harry Potter for two hours without much interruption) and having Korner Pizza Friday with the flatmates. I don't know what we're planning on watching, movie-wise... Sometime tomorrow I would like to finally see "Shopgirl" and "The New World" but you know how that goes. Saturday I will try my Tarantino double feature again... and that night X+J and I are going to watch "Wolf Creek" together.

um. that's it for me.

title quote: 'til tuesday, "Sleeping & Waking" from WELCOME HOME
music du jour: again, it was an all Tanya Donelly/belly day.
dvd player: Cracker: Lucky White Ghost
bookbag: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. What I'm expecting- Death (Sirius? Ginny? A Weasley?)
celebrity sightings: 1: Danny DeVito was in the store today! He kinda reminds me of my boss. He's actually shorter than I imagined him to be- but this could have been because I saw him walking with Dylan, who's even taller than me (and also the most adorable guy on the planet). I was standing at my cart when he walked up to us and I literally stopped for a moment while it registered that Danny DeVito was talking to us. Very cool.
YTD Sightings-15

it's just so different/from what you pictured/it's just so fucking quiet

2006-05-18T02:23:00.000-04:00

so my day was interesting. last night i stayed up till like 2 watching CRACKER. woke up to go to the bathroom this morning and, seeing that it was already light out figured i wouldn't be getting any more sleep. luckily, it was only 6, so i had another hour and a half to sleep. i woke up at 7:20, figured that's that and turned off my alarm. then i went back to sleep... woke up at 5 after eight... 5 minutes after the time i'd normally leave for an opening shift. i hurried through my shower and hauled ass to the train- which rolled in soon after. it was express. it was empty, so i got a seat. i got to work 15 minutes early- the same time i would normally get in. woo-hoo!!

today i gave the store manager my transfer request information. it was really kind of sad. i like this store a lot more than the one i used to work at. it's going to be like going from college back to kindergarten and i suspect that i'll be looking for something else before too long.

at home, i hung out with x+j and later, lily. i feel like veruca salt- i want everything. i want to be around these people and the ones that i've met over the last year, and feel the way i do when i'm with them; i want to have my family with me; i want to work in this store where i'm not condescended to & treated like shit, where there are people i like who like me, where i feel like i can actually do my job the way it ought to be done. i mean, even if it's an inconsequential retail job... it makes a huge difference. why can't there be a way to keep it all? why can't my mom just like, win the lottery and move up to vermont or somewhere close by so that i won't feel like the biggest part of my soul is so fucking far away from me? i lost a whole year with my mom, i'm miserable without her or Dave around me and i won't do that to myself for another year... i keep wondering: is there going to be a point in my life where i've got everything i need to be happy?

-rick

title quote: Beth Thornley, "Double Wide" from MY GLASS EYE
music du jour: Tanya Donelly/belly/Beth Thornley
dvd player: Cracker: Lucky White Ghost (even though i was TOTALLY going to watch WOLF CREEK, which I got from Netflix, but X wants to watch it, so I told him I'd wait... despite the perfect scary movie environment going on right now what with the 2 in the morning & the dark stormy-ish night)
bookbag: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-14

There are as many forms of love as there are moments in time

2006-05-16T03:42:00.000-04:00

So according to Celebmatch.com I am the most compatible with Jonny Lee Miller and Noah Wyle (as well as Josh Duhamel & Jamie Oliver- whatever)

Jonny Lee Miller? ooooooooohhhhhhh yeahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

-rick
will pretend that one of the other names on the list wasn't Mark Wahlberg.

title quote: Jonny Lee Miller as Edmund Bertram in MANSFIELD PARK
music du jour: all Beth Thornley, all day
dvd player: Shopgirl
bookbag: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. ...Tonk is going to die, isn't she? I like her...
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-14

a million lights are dancing & there you are, a shooting star/an everlasting world & you're here with me, eternally/Xanadu your neon lights will shine

2006-05-13T12:35:00.000-04:00

So, I'm watching CITIZEN KANE and there's this bit at the beginning, the newsreel about Kane's life- There's a moment that takes place in Union Square. So there's a giant mass of people rallying on 17th street in front of that little building at the top of the park- and then it cuts to a shot of the mob, standing in front of a building- and that building is number 33... which is now the Barnes & Noble where I work. How. Fucking. Cool. Is. THAT??

I'm going to see if X is able to get a screen shot for me, then I'll post it up later.

I hate Hearst. If he hadn't fucked with Orson Welles & CITIZEN KANE imagine what Welles could have done. He was such a pioneer, someone who brought something to film that no one before him had. I don't think most people today can really comprehend what it must have been like to see CITIZEN KANE when it was released.

Anyway- today's plan was to do a double feature double feature. Welles/Tarantino. KANE & A TOUCH OF EVIL and RESERVOIR DOGS & PULP FICTION.

considering the time, I don't think I'm going to be able to do all this, so I'll probably watch the Welles films today and save QT for Friday. Oh work... you really fuck up my dvd watching time.

title quote: Olivia Newton John, "Xanadu" yeah you heard me.
music du jour: Aimee Mann
dvd player: Citizen Kane
bookbag: Harry Potter & the Order of the Phoenix
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-14

beneath the blue sky we're all alone together/the calm hides stormy weather

2006-05-12T11:08:00.000-04:00

So my mom sent me an e-mail to tell me that the Go-Go's were going to be playing in the plaza on the Today show next week. Which made me think again about the fact that they were playing next Friday night at the Nokia Theatre. I've been tossing the idea of going around in my head for a while. It's 40 bucks. It's the Go-Go's, they were my first concert and are one of my all-time favorite bands. But then... I haven't really enjoyed concert-going that much lately. It's general admission. When I checked the site the problem was solved for me- It's sold out. Of course there's always the option of dragging my ass out of bed, going down to Rockefeller Center and watching them play on the Today Show.

or i could just listen to them on my ipod all day, peacefully, in my room. Belindariffic!!

-rick
title quote: The Go-Go's, "Beneath the blue sky" from TALK SHOW
music du jour: Take a wild guess.
dvd player: Today I WILL watch DELICATESSEN and follow it up with a little CITY OF LOST CHILDREN. Viva Jeunet!!
bookbag: HARRY POTTER AND THE ORDER OF THE PHOENIX (did you see what happened there?)
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-14

you make quite a flare, my bright bottle rocket

2006-05-12T00:54:00.000-04:00

So sorry if you're reading this twice, but I have to represent pics/frames:

That's right kids, it's a new issue of Pictures and Frames @ www.picturesandframesmagazine.com

this month we take on some movies: BRICK (which everyone i know, or even "myspace know" ought to have seen already. seriously don't make me delete our friendship.); The Danielson Family Movie; and oh my god- SLITHER!?!

in our DVD department you can read all about MEAN CREEK and 9 TO 5. (Dolly Parton for President! Who's with me?!?)

Books-wise, I am KING!! Or possibly the only Pix/Framer who can read. Anyway, I doubled up on Sarah Dunant's historical fiction this month. Prepare for June's dissertation on the Harry Potter series.

Musically there are reviews for The Little Willies, Ani DiFranco and The Magic Numbers. THE MAGIC NUMBERS!!!

And finally, P&F's resident idolator, Dave Sayre, worships at the church of David Morse for the May Spotlight.

So what the hell are you waiting for? go to
www.picturesandframesmagazine.com RIGHT NOW!! (oh yeah, if you wanna ramble on about pop culture you can always drop a line about becoming a contributer.)

*Seriously- ESPECIALLY if you want to review books... it would be awesome if you'd like to write for this humble little webzine.

*I'm so impressed with David's Spotlight pieces. Jealous actually. One more thing he's freaking awesome at. You may be a better writer, buddy but I will always be gayer than you!! Unless you start dating Elton John. or Sean Hayes. or Tom Cruise. or one of the SO FUCKING ANNOYING Gay Jays from America's Next Top Model. I haven't hated on my own people this much since... ok truth be told, I'm not usually very fond of my own people. But I haven't wanted to commit gay on gay violence this much since the couple on SHOWDOG MOMS & DADS. ...Perhaps this is all a message telling me that I should avoid watching Reality Television shows. David would probably agree.

*My middle finger on my right hand is becoming really rough- a combination of using it on my trackpad and it being my scan finger @ work. Inventory is coming up and I scanned half of the books in my section over the last two days. It hurts me to type the letter K. I'll update you on my progress later.

*MYSPACE is totally bringing people together. Today this really cool girl from my work, who I usually never speak to & vice versa (actually she always kind of scared me- she seems to usually be in a rush and i usually feel like i'm in her way) told me that she came across my profile & discovered that I like Travis- and she's apparently a giant fan. Of course the dark side of Myspace would be that creepy pornish "Sir Eric" who sends me a friend request every other day... Yikes.

*Robbie Coltrane is the awesomest.

*Watching WONDER SHOWZEN at 7:30 in the morning, while kind of a fucked up way to start the day, also gives you something funny to think about while you're at work.

*mwah*

title quote: Beth Thornley, "Stand" from MY GLASS EYE
music du jour: Beth Thornley: MY GLASS EYE
dvd player: CRACKER: Season Three
bookbag: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (which I am so going to finish when i'm done with this)
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-14

hand me a prayer book/i need to be forgiven/i'm not even driving/i'm just plain driven

2006-05-08T10:56:00.000-04:00

title quote: The Divinyls, "Bless my soul it's rock & roll" from DIVINYLS
music du jour: Beth Thornley/MY GLASS EYE
dvd player: The Family Stone- maybe today I will finally be able to watch Little Fish and Delicatessen
bookbag: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-14

Your Deadly Sins

Sloth: 80%

Gluttony: 40%

Lust: 20%

Wrath: 20%

Envy: 0%

Greed: 0%

Pride: 0%

Chance You'll Go to Hell: 23%

You will die while sleeping - and no one will notice.

How Sinful Are You?

6 hours! I don't even like to have sex and eat bacon for six hours!

2006-05-06T00:49:00.000-04:00

DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS is SO my favorite musical. Norbert Leo Butz is freaking awesome. I did miss Sherie Rene Scott, but Rachel York did a good job. I could absolutely see it again and again and again.

keep your hand at the level of your eye!

2006-05-05T10:45:00.000-04:00

title quote: Phantom of the Opera, which we saw last night. My surprise to my mom for Mother's Day.
music du jour: Beth Thornley/My Glass Eye
dvd player: Little Fish
bookbag: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
celebrity sightings, MONA LISA SMILE edition: 1.5: Julia Stiles was standing outside the theatre where History Boys is at. And there was a retarded crowd of people waiting outside the theatre for Julia Roberts- totally blocking our way as we tried to get to the train. No, I didn't see her gigantic mouth, but the back of her head.
Me: Dude, Ralph Fiennes is right down the street! Why is everyone waiting to see Julia Roberts?
Random Teen Who Overheard Me: BECAUSE SHE'S A HUGE STAR!!
Me (24 hours later, obviously): Yeah, but he's an actor.
YTD Sightings-14

Retarded Whippet

2006-04-28T00:46:00.000-04:00

... Or, How I Met Lord Voldemart, Senator Palpatine and The World's Most Beautiful Woman.

Saw FAITH HEALER tonight (after a lovely dinner at um... the Sweet Shoppe? with Lily & Gill) We got a bit lost (my fault) and ended up being about 15 minutes late, so we had to stand in the back for the first act, but still got to see everything. I wasn't wild about the play- I like the basic storyline, the kinda Rashomon-ish-ness of it... but it never fully grabbed me. The performances, however, were fantastic. Ralph Fiennes is, as Lily says, flawless. Cherry Jones moves me incredibly- she just seems to act with every inch of her being. Ian McDiarmid stole the show as Teddy. We headed to the stage door after the show and I got my playbill signed by all three actors. Cherry Jones- SO incredibly beautiful. Ralph- looked me in the eye... yeah, I had a moment with Ralph Fiennes.

So- Lee Pace and Ralph Fiennes in one week? If only Natasha Richardson was around for a complete WHITE COUNTESS reunion. Oh, I love that movie... can't wait for it to be out on dvd.

so, yeah. good thursday.

title quote: FAITH HEALER
music du jour: 1993- Sarah McLachlan, Concrete Blonde, Belly, Melissa Etheridge
dvd player: GILMORE GIRLS: Season Five
bookbag: HARRY POTTER AND THE GOBLET OF FIRE
celebrity sightings: 3!
YTD Sightings-13

Norman Mailer, I'm pregnant!

2006-04-23T04:08:00.000-04:00

http://www.ymdb.com/ricksayre/l35388_ukuk.html

this is my page on Your Movie Database. check it out! start yer own! it's pointless, but fun!

meanwhile, i had a dream last night that i was walking across Scotland and there were dogs all around me... i was surrounded by the damn things... weird.
so today x+j+i watched Veronica Mars (disc 4!!) and our Jackie Chan movie of the week, Legend of Drunken Master. fun stuff. that guy is just so fucking awesome... *sigh* why can't i kick ass like that?

title quote: Suki on GILMORE GIRLS
music du jour: none, actually. oh... the dandy warhols
dvd player: GILMORE GIRLS: Season Five
bookbag: HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-10

we're bobbin' along in a barrel/some of us tip right over the edge

2006-04-22T00:36:00.000-04:00

So tonight I met Lily at Union Square at 6, we had dinner at Cozy's (burger burger BURGER) and then went to see GUARDIANS, a play with Lee Pace & Katherine Moening. The play was interesting, but I really felt like I'm too much of a meathead for something as political as it is, but let's face it, I was there for the actors and really, they were both pretty great. Moening was a bit too- I dunno, she had a lot of ticks going on and it got a bit distracting, but she did quite well. I kept thinking about how odd it was that a few years ago I actually became addicted to that show YOUNG AMERICANS because her character was so cool (she was pretending to be a boy, but then Ian Somerhalder devolped a crush on her, which confused him as he thought she was a guy), never suspecting that years later I'd be in NYC watching her in a show. Lee Pace was absolutely flawless (a word i dislike to use, so that should tell you something) and his hands... wow. He's a tall drink of water... After the show we hung out to see if I could get him to sign my playbill- which he did. But of course I felt like an ass for asking, the pen I gave him didn't work very well, he said "thanks for coming" and I just stood there dumbly and said "you were really great" and walked away feeling like a tool. THIS is why we don't talk to famous people kids, especially ones that are breathtakingly handsome. I wish I wasn't such a meathead, I might have had something interesting to say to him. Oh well, whatever. It was still pretty cool. Lily later said that we ought to have brought a cow creamer to give him in honor of WONDERFALLS- now that would have been cool.

title quote: XTC, "I Wonder Why the Wonderfalls"
music du jour: Ani DiFranco
dvd player: GILMORE GIRLS: Season Five
bookbag: HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN
celebrity sightings: 1 (I didn't spot Moening after the show)
YTD Sightings-10

all right then, harry?

2006-04-19T23:06:00.000-04:00

*Finished NORMA SHEARER and am more bummed than ever at the lack of Norma's films on dvd. I really REALLY want to see Marie Antoinette especially, but all the rest of the movies I haven't seen yet. I think Idiot's Delight will be on TCM sometime in May.

*My mom's coming to visit!! Hooray! Making plans is cheering me up a lot.

um. nothing else to report for now.

title quote: Colin Creevy
music du jour: I have spent most of the week listening to my favorite playlist, "Songs I Know By Heart" which is all the Bic Runga/Travis albums. It makes me very happy, calms me on the subways and basically puts some much needed bounce in my step.
dvd player: ALIAS: Season Four
bookbag: HARRY POTTER AND THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS
celebrity sightings: Okay... 1: Jane Fonda, book signing. She was a great speaker, I got a signed copy of the book. Fabulous. Yesterday I missed a celebrity sighting- Julian Casablancas of The Strokes was in... but whatever. Today, there was a guy- I know he's a character actor, seen him many times before, but couldn't place him. :( sorry.
YTD Sightings-9

That is the ugliest f-ing skirt I have ever seen.

2006-04-15T12:37:00.000-04:00

so i just realized that there's this odd "That 70s Show" thing happening all around me... First, Danny "I'm so freaking hot" Masterson on Myspace and then last week's Ashton Kutcher sighting... What's next, Wilmer uh... I mean Topher Grace? please please please- Oh hang on... I found IN GOOD COMPANY on dvd at Academy for 6 dollars the other day. Does that count? What then? Mila Kunis? please, no... although maybe she was at the Macauley Culkin book reading at the store next month. WHOA- I am totally being stalked by "That 70s Show" castmembers! Why can't it be T.R. Knight from "Grey's Anatomy" instead?

Anyway. We have made a huge change in the flat. Saturday Night Korner Pizza Jackie Chan/Random Asian Guy Night has been altered. See, Lily often goes to church on Saturday nights and that makes it a heathens only affair. Sooo we have created Korner Pizza Friday Nights. Currently it's Korner Pizza Veronica Mars Friday- we watched disc 3 last night, 3 more to go. It's not as awesome as I was expecting- It's no BUFFY kids, and definitely not ever to be compared with BRICK, but it's fun. After the VM has been exhausted we're going to pick movies that one of us has seen, but the others haven't. So far my ideas have been slightly random, but this is what I'm thinking so far:
*Cracker (The UK television series with Robbie Coltrane)
*Murder by Death
*The Cat's Meow
*Girls Will Be Girls (okay, Lily saw this one & I think it's maybe too mean for her)
*That episode of ANGEL where he gets turned into a puppet is something that I think I mention EVERY SINGLE DAY and am always threatening to make x+j watch. This is the perfect opportunity.
There are more, but I can't think of them right now. Anyway, X+J and I are still going to have Jackie Chan/Random Asian Guy Saturdays, just without Korner Pizza. Or with leftover Korner Pizza. pizza. pizza. pizza. Sadly, our Jackie Chan movie didn't arrive yet, so we'll be watching a movie I own- INFERNAL AFFAIRS... which is like HARDBOILED, only better. And it has Tony Leung. Who was actually in HARDBOILED as well... hmmm.
This afternoon, though? Rachel McAdamsPalooza. Everyone have a nice weekend.
-rick

title quote: MEAN GIRLS
music du jour: Ani Difranco/CARNEGIE HALL 4.6.02
dvd player: ALIAS: Season Four
bookbag: Gavin Lambert's NORMA SHEARER
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-8

i've been losing confidence in me/just when i'm feeling the strength i get weak

2006-04-13T01:50:00.000-04:00

Talking to my mom lately makes me feel better, knowing that in a few months I'll be at home with the family. (Plus there was the brief mention of a fantasy about moving to Gainesville- which is really cool & an idea we had briefly mentioned a while ago. Gainesville is a bit further north from where my Granny lives, very cool little college town, not really a big hurricane target... most importantly NOT MIAMI. but as I said it was a small mention & a fantasy, but maybe there's some hope)
Other than that I've been down, depressed and a bit disenchanted with work. At first it seemed that there was so much to do and keep busy with in my new position, but most days I end up being really bored with nothing to do. Despite the fact that I read the first Harry Potter book last month, I feel really uncomfortable/guilty about reading on the job, even though there is a lot of time when there's literally nothing else to do. The last couple of days I've been really down/exhausted and ended up leaving work a few hours early today since there were 3 people in my zone and again, nothing to work on. I got home, had a long hot shower and then took a nap and watched another Carole Lombard movie (We're Not Dressing- Gracie Allen & George Burns are hysterical. Bing Crosby? Kind of creepy). The flatmates all watched some tv together and basically it ended up being a nice evening. I'm still pretty awake, so I'm going to watch more Lombard!
and of course I'll remember my mom's advice: This too shall pass...

-rick
title quote: Badly Drawn Boy, "A peak you reach" from ABOUT A BOY
music du jour: Badly Drawn Boy all day... damn I love him.
dvd player: WE'RE NOT DRESSING, from the CAROLE LOMBARD GLAMOUR COLLECTION
bookbag: Gavin Lambert's NORMA SHEARER
celebrity sightings: 0, despite thinking that I saw Miss Jay from America's Next Top Model on the train. In fact, it was just a very unfortunate looking woman.
YTD Sightings-8

whatever and ever, amen.

2006-04-10T12:23:00.000-04:00

new resolution- i don't care. yeah, so this is it- if i sleep/stay in bed until 12:30- half an hour before i have to leave for work, well, whatever. i go to work for the longest, most boring 8 hours and then come home and will probably be up till 3 in the morning anyway. sunday, monday & thursday will all be wasted days- but at least i won't have to get up any earlier. tuesdays will suck half the time- laundry night every other week. Wednesdays will suck as I have to get up early, ride the train at the worst times of the day- but the whole America's Next Top Model/Lost night with x+j sort of evens things out. basically i'm living for Thursday night at 11 through Sunday afternoon at 1. except for next Sunday, being Easter when my work hours go all wonky. hmmm. 12:35 time to get out of bed.

all we have here is sky/all the sky is is blue/all the blue is is one more colour

2006-04-09T23:23:00.000-04:00

i am so fucking depressed.

title quote: Sarah Polley, "One More Colour" from THE SWEET HEREAFTER soundtrack
music du jour: Etta James/ALL THE WAY
dvd player: ALIAS: Season Four
bookbag: Neil Gaiman's STARDUST
celebrity sightings: 1: ASHTON FUCKING KUTCHER. He was soooo... goddamn hot. hot. mcmuffin!
YTD Sightings-8

"Ima. I'm a-gonna kick your-"

2006-04-07T03:47:00.000-04:00

Take the quiz:
What Natural DISASTER are you?

Acid Rain
n. Acid precipitation falling as rain.You are one of the sadder souls that walks this planet, but you've realized the true nature of humanity.

Quizzes by myYearbook.com -- the World's Biggest Yearbook!

title quote: ALIAS: Season Four
music du jour: Cassandra Wilson: THUNDERBIRD and Etta James: ALL THE WAY. but mostly Cassandra.
dvd player: ALIAS: Season Four (see... it's all connected)
bookbag: Neil Gaiman's STARDUST (which i cannot remember reading at all)
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-7

if you knew what i know/you wouldn't go to see her/& least of all believe her/when she says that she wants you

2006-04-03T01:01:00.000-04:00

top 25 ipod tunes for March:

25. Patrick Doyle, "Kissing in the rain" from Great Expectations: The Score
24. Neko Case, "Loretta" from The Tigers Have Spoken
23. Neko Case, "At last" from Fox Confessor Brings the Flood
22. Neko Case, "Margaret vs. Pauline" from Fox...
21. Loretta Lynn, "Woman of the world (leave my man alone)" from All Time Greatest Hits
20. Joey McIntyre, "Stay the same" from Stay the Same
19. Holly Palmer, "Something else" from Tender Hooks
18. Holly Palmer, "You keep me hangin' on" from I Confess
17. Holly Palmer, "Superjones" from I Confess
16. Holly Palmer, "All I really wanna do" from Different Languages
15. Fiona Apple, "Tymps (the sick in the head song)" from Extraordinary Machine
14. Björk, "Cocoon" from Vespertine
13. Neko Case, "If I'm gonna sink (I might as well go to the bottom)" from Touch My Heart
12. Neko Case, "This little light" from The Tigers Have Spoken
11. Neko Case, "Hex" from The Tigers...
10. Loretta Lynn, "Fist City" from All Time Greatest Hits
9. Bic Runga, "Sway" (acoustic b-side)
8. Terence Blanchard, "He was beautiful to me" from The Caveman's Valentine: Score
7. Terence Blanchard, "Main Title" from Eve's Bayou: The Score
6. Loretta Lynn, "She's got you" from All Time Greatest Hits
5. Third Eye Blind, "New girl" from American Pie
4. Neko Case, "If you knew" from The Tigers Have Spoken
3. Fiona Apple, "Better version of me" from Extraordinary Machine
2. Bic Runga, "Something good" (live) from Beautiful Collision: Special Edition
1. Sublime, "Santeria" from Sublime

title quote: Neko Case, "If you knew" from The Tigers Have Spoken
music du jour: a lot of tanya donelly/belly, joni mitchell
dvd player: Layer Cake. not really feeling it though.
bookbag: finishing Sarah Dunant's IN THE COMPANY OF THE COURTESAN
celebrity sightings: 0- i was half an hour too late to catch Uma Thurman & Ethan Hawke, though. dammit!!
YTD Sightings-7

I gave you jared to see him eaten, not to see you fed.

2006-03-31T13:53:00.000-05:00

I woke up at 8:30 on my day off to see the 10:45 show of BRICK on it's opening day.

It was so fucking worth it.

Thank you, Bank Robber.

2006-03-31T02:56:00.000-05:00

Feeling blue-ish and wanting to do something fun after work, I treated myself to INSIDE MAN.

it. kicks. SO MUCH ASS!! In fact, I was mad about the fact that I went alone because I had no one to share my enthusiasm with!! except for all of ya'll.

tomorrow morning? BRICK. woo-hoo.

title quote: INSIDE MAN
music du jour: all Holly Palmer, all day long
dvd player: SIX FEET UNDER: Season Five (i've watched like 5 minutes of the first episode)
bookbag: BATMAN: THE LONG HALLOWEEN
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-7

you've been unmindfully moving/so aimlessly towards an end you can't see/that now you're right where you don't wanna be

2006-03-28T13:44:00.000-05:00

Right, so there's this song by a singer called Beth Thornley, who sent me one of those random invites you get on myspace from musicians- which i usually just delete- but I liked her stuff, especially this song called "You're right where." You can hear it, it's on her myspace page if you wanna look her up, but also at www.beththornley.com under the Music link. It feels like the perfect song for me right now, definitely speaks to me about the way I feel right now... it definitely knocked me for a loop. The album's out on April 20th and I will SO be there.
Every day I tend to question more & more what I'm doing here, how I ever thought that I could be happy with my family so far away. At this point it's like picking at a scab, though. I've already decided that I want to go home and it's all set for July, so I just have to bear with it for the next few months. It's also become hard because I know that there are people who want me to stay and whenever anyone makes a comment about it, it kind of breaks my heart. I feel like I'm selling people out/disappointing them, which of course makes me feel worse about everything. I just hope that I'm able to get through this depression, the constant feeling of homesickness, so that the rest of my time here isn't completely me feeling like this. I also have to stop questioning the decision to come up here in the first place. It has been an amazing experience and I can't regret doing it. One season to go...

title quote: Beth Thornley, "You're right where" from MY GLASS EYE
music du jour: Nothing, so far. Probably a little Fiona Apple later, though.
dvd player: THE WORK OF DIRECTOR ANTON CORBIJN
bookbag: Sarah Dunant's IN THE COMPANY OF THE COURTESAN. Which I must finish before I even let myself open up the long-awaited Norma Shearer biography that's on it's way.
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-7
what i wish i'd said: "Like, a thousand times smarter than you." -To the guy who came in looking for SAT study guides. When I told him that most people buy this one particular series, he asked, "Yeah but do they look smart or do they look like stupid people?" Then when I handed the book to him, he said, "So this book's the shit, right?" ...sometimes it makes my brain hurt.

burning my pictures and smashing my mirrors

2006-03-27T11:35:00.000-05:00

My Weekend Update
Updated

Main activity: lazing about, watching dvds

Hung out with: X+Lily (J deserted us this weekend)

Funniest thing: "Jodie Foster's knuckles"

Worst thing: The fact that Lily & I still found the pizza guy superhot even after he spat on the sidewalk in front of us.

Time I got home: I only left the house for pizza & groceries...

Time I was supposed to be home: Hammertime!

Latest time I woke up: Noon. I suck.

Most suspicious activity: Erasing my Myspace profile & ending my old blog to avoid further EvilFagDrama. It's like I'm in the Witness Protection Program, kids.

Hottest outfit: Oh. No.

Laziest outfit: My pajamas.

Plans for next weekend: Laze about. Watch dvds.

title quote: Echo & the Bunnymen, "Seven Seas"
music du jour: Beth Thornley's Myspace page and the hammering in the apartment above. AAAAARGH!!!!
dvd player: THE WORK OF DIRECTOR ANTON CORBIJN
bookbag: Sarah Dunant's IN THE COMPANY OF THE COURTESAN
celebrity sightings: 0
YTD Sightings-7

here it comes/a better version of me

2006-03-24T17:48:00.000-05:00

another season, another blog. another beginning?

dear ipod,
as i am no longer in high school, you really don't have to play The Doors every single day.
xxoo,
rick

title quote: Fiona Apple, "A Better Version of Me" from EXTRAORDINARY MACHINE
music du jour: Brandi Carlile
dvd player: Morlang
bookbag: Sarah Dunant's IN THE COMPANY OF THE COURTESAN
celebrity sightings: 0. Although I thought I saw Felicity Huffman yesterday. But she was too short to be FH.
YTD Sightings-7